Rebecca Black walks into a bar and asks for a beer. The bartender doesnt serve her because she is 12.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Feel free to call me, forget the money, as for my fucking eye, I just sure as hell hope those responsible are rotting in prison. I mean I just lost an eye right? Just kidding, I am the one who has been dead wrong here, I judged you wrong, I am the fuck that seems to feel responsible for the actions of others at times, then again I thought that you where sending them against me, they surely claimed they where, but fuck, people use all sorts of things and people as an excuse to do whatever the hell they want.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

What's the difference between an orange? Two typewriters, because vests don't have sleeves.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Dear Jim, I have a problem with my Hymen... "Jim'll fix it for you..."

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Knock knock ? Who's there ? Ipe Ipe who ? You sick !

thumb_up thumb_down -7

What is black and bad for your teeth? A cannon ball

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Wuy are Kenyans so fast? Because due to variations in evolution, people from that part of the world have a better muscle build to run at higher speeds than equally trained athletes from other parts of the world.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Why did Jack take a prune out for the evening? A healthy snack as part of a balanced diet.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

a black man walks out of popeyes

thumb_up thumb_down -7

how many milkshakes does it take to bring all the boys to the yard?

thumb_up thumb_down -7

A man and his wife go out to dinner, after dinner they return home safely and the man kisses his wife good night. He then leaves his house, and goes to a bar with another women. He is a polygamast and it is socially acceptable in his town.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

What did the little boy get on christmas morning? Cancer.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

What does a man want more than sex? Nothing.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Knock Knock Come in

thumb_up thumb_down -7

To the 'am i pregnant now?'-section: Yesterday I spilled mustard on my brand new pants. That was just before I went out to some clubs. That night, after I had enjoyed myself with friends and alcohol, while I was walking home I was raped several times by big, black and hung men. It hurt a lot and my anus is still bleeding. My question is: What is the best way to get rid of the mustard stain?

thumb_up thumb_down -7

What did the mute person tell the deaf person? Nothing. Even if sound could emit from his vocals the impaired of hearing person would still be unable to respond unless they have taken classes to read lips. The deaf person didn't take classes nor did the mute person learn sign language.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

3 men are walking down a dirt path. One is a retired member of the US Air Force. The other of the Marines. The last one of the Navy. They are arguing about why their respective section of the military is the best. They lose track of where they're going and fall off of a cliff onto the spinning propeller of a US Coast Guard helicopter.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

-Knock knock. ~Use the doorbell. -Ding dong. ~The witch is dead!

thumb_up thumb_down -7

whats worse then finding a worm in your apple? getting stranded on an island with your best friend and realizing several days later that you will have to eat him to survive. hours after eating your friend a boat saves you and now have to live the rest of your life knowing you ate somebody.................... oh and the Holocaust

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Yo mama is so fat, Dora couldn't explore her. Yo mama is so dumb she brought a spoon to the Super bowl. Yo mama so hairy, Bigfoot took her picture and screamed he was gonna be a millionare.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Why did the old man miss the Alzheimer's Day walk? Because he died in his sleep.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

What do you call a man that paints on a his face and wears big shoes? Lady Gaga.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

What's orange and not an orange? An orange.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

What was Helen Keller's favorite activity? fingering herself...

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops