hey do you eat out a woman properly? you cook her first and then eat her. -jeffery dahmers

YOUR MOM SHOT YOU OUT HER ASS!!!

What do you call a cow after an earthquake? Dead. The barn collapsed on top of it.

Why did the black man rob the store? Because he was hard on money for a reason not associated with race or stereotypes whatsoever.

There's a skunk and a lawyer standing on the side of the road, what's the difference? There are tire marks infront of the skunk.

What's worse than a dead baby? The corpse is chopped into little pieces And is put in a blender. Worse than that? An alive baby stuffed into a blender. Worse than that? Hellen Keller put into a blender. Worse than that? The holocaust.

Why is a bulldog so aggressive Because it was raised for dog fights in basements Dog fights aren't right kids, and you should never get involved but if you find yourself in the cage fighting one of the dogs, you should really think about how you got there.

How many licks does it take to get to the center of a Tootsie Pop? It's hard to say, as this number depends on a large number of factors including the average area covered by one lick, the pH of saliva, the solubility of Tootsie Pops, the temperature of both the saliva and the Tootsie Pop, and the amount of saliva deposited on the Tootsie Pop after each lick. This is not to mention all the manufacturing irregularities that may occur during production, and varying tongue shapes and solvency properties of saliva.

a horse walks into a blender ow

What's the difference between a baby and a textbook? You throw a textbook at the wall with TWO hands.

roses are red violets are blue i forgot what i was gonna say my dad is an engineer

what's funnier than hell? heaven

Roses are Red Violets are Purple Not blue

What is black, white and red all over? An interracial couple that has been shot and murdered.

why did Kelsey fall off the swing? because she has no arms Knock Knock who's there? not Kelsey

British Dentistry

Why is Helen Keller a bad driver? Because her inability to see or hear makes her an extremely dangerous road hazard.

Did you hear about the mail man without a mail truck? He walked

whats worse than finding a worm in your apple All of the antijokes about it

Your grandma and your mom drove of a cliff, who survived? Both of them they didn't drive off a cliff

LeBron James hits a game winning three with time running out in the Finals.

Yo mama looks so much like a cardboard box, my kindergarten class graduated.

what did the rooster get for his birthday? nothing

What do you call a cheese that's not yours? Cheese

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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