why was the asian women such a bad driver? she was blind and had no arms

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A man walks into a bar...... He then wakes up in a hospital. along with a large bruise on his forehead.

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What do you get if you cross a nan and a car? A squashed dead nan who released their bowels and your grandads face who was also dead as they had a cardiac arrest

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What do you call a man with no arms or legs? Whatever his parents named him

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Is it possible to mix an answer to a question with another? No. Aids are perfect for fear training.

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Why was Timmy sad? While helping his dad hang Christmas light, he got tangled up in them and fell down. While falling he grabbed a wire, which caused a spark. This spark lit the house on fire. Since he broke most of the bones in his body from falling he could not run away. The house proceeded to collapse an poor Timmy seriously injuring and hideously disfiguring him. By the time the ambulance got there, Timmy was the only survivor for his parents died of smoke inhalation. Since he had no other living relatives he was forced to live in an orphanage for the rest of his childhood. That is why Timmy is sad.

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A woman is getting in the shower but the the doorbell rings so she puts on her towel and gets the door a man is there asking for sugar. Then she gets back into the shower then the doorbell rang again so she puts on her towel and anwsers the door another man is there he asked for some batteries she gave him some and went back to the shower. Then she hears the doorbell again she thought since there wasn't anybody else that lived on her street she decided to just go to the door without her towel so she answers the door thinking the blindmans there and it was the police man.

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There were two ducks in a bathtub. One duck says to the other, "Pass me the soap" The other duck replies, "What do i look like, a toaster?"

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Knock, knock. Knock, knock. Knock, knock. Guess no ones home.

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You shouldn't have expectations. They make ex out of pect and tations.

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What's worse than finding a worm in your Holocaust? Oh, wait, I said it wrong...

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A duck walks into a bar, and the bartender asks what will you have for dinner? The duck says "quack".

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sharks

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What do you call some one in the middle of the ocean without a boat skrewed.

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Why did Peter go to the dentist? Because he had to go to the dentist!

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you know why Michael J Fox makes the best milkshakes? no... but his milkshakes brings all the boys to the yard

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Error 37.

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What did the screwdriver do when it was insulted? It got up and walked away.

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Paul Walker: Breaks, stop Breaks: No

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Q: What's worse than seeing a scorpion A: being stung by that scorpion

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Q: How many babies does it take to paint a wall? A: Depends how hard you throw them.

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Knock knock Come in

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Whats red and smells like Bacon. Bacon

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Roses are brown Violets are brown Who shit in my garden

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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