Why can't the Mexican float? He never learned the proper technique as he was not allowed to take swim class.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? A man held him at gunpoint and threatened to kill his entire family.

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My friends all use twitter but i dont know how to use it, so i said i will carry a megaphone around saying what i am doing at random times. Like yesterday i was in the library so i said into my megaphone "i am in the library" Yay i got 3 new followers, 2 of them were cops. Jokes From Blox Computers Corporation [Thailand] Bellow Joke In Thai: ?????? Twitter ???????????????? ??????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????? ? ???????????????????????????? ???????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????? "i am ??????????" ??????????????? 3, 2 ????????????????????

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What do Michael Jackson and a T-Rex have in common? They're both dead.

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A horse walks into a bar... The bartender says, "Why the long face?" The horse says, "I have testicular cancer........"

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The world does not deserve our rule, it requires effort, teamwork, respect for oneself and others, tolerance, love, patience, strength, honor, loyalty... ...Face it, people do this because it is far easier to be ruled, than to rule, it is far easier to do as told, than to ask oneself what one desires with ones life. A king that suffers the burden of his people, falls of his throne, a king that enjoys the burdens of his people, creates burden, and grows as people suffer. We cannot change that, maybe we have yet to evolve to that point as humans, or maybe it is time to accept, that we have evolved past this.

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Why is the post under me so funny? Because the boy won't be able to play the x box!

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How many Spanish people does it take to screw in a light bulb? Uno

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Two colleague janitors sit next to each other in the coffee room, one says to the other: About yesterday... I checked three times and it looks pretty normal. Sorry... I wasn't around to hear the question the other posed the day before, but I heard it's supposed to be pretty funny with this answer. So... Less is better then none, right?

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holly shit!!!! when did i get on the internet !?

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Roses are red. Violets are blue. Sugar is sweet. You're adopted.

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Q. What's white, has an orange bill, and looks like a swan? A. a swan

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Mom I am so sorry I molested you yesterday. Im not your mom! Phew, wanna go out?

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Why is the beach always so angry? The beach is just sand and waves and lacks sentience, but makes up for it in crabs.

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A Jewish person was found dead in an alley way last night, Hitler did nothing wrong.

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Why is a cat in the desert like Christmas? Because Egypt is a country of deserts, the Egyptians had cats and Jesus, Mary and Joseph escaped to Egypt in the Christmas story before Herod carried out his massacre in Bethlehem on baby boys of under two years old.

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69- by Adam Chebali

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What is the meaning of life? 42

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Did you hear the one about the avalanche that crashed into the bar? It was such a tragedy.

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What's the difference between a Jew and a pizza? One is a human being belonging to a particular religious minority and the other is a delicious Italian food favoured by English speaking western cultures. The problem with this anti-joke is that the facts are not correct, pizza was originally invented and China; however,it looked quite different then what might be considered pizza by our standards, when pizza was brought to Italy it was improved to make what we now consider pizza in modern times. While some people may consider pizza an Italian food, this would be failing to give credit to the Chinese who invented it.

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These two guys walk into a bar. You'd think the second guy would've noticed it was there.

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koala's try to hit on teddy bears...... desperate even though we know extinction's comin

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When life gives you lemons, you are probably crazy because life cannot give you lemons.

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Help me I need to know how to cook a human fetus by tomorrow does anyone know any good recipes?

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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