How do pigs get hurt? They are run over by a tractor.

What's funnier than the holocaust? Nothing.

What is black, white, and red all over? A penguin in a blender.

Knock, Knock whos there? Jesus Jesus who? Jesus Christ

What did the one horse say to the other. Nothing because horses can't talk.

A man walks into a bar...... He then wakes up in a hospital. along with a large bruise on his forehead.

Q: What did the Goth-Punk girl write on her test for the question "What are three kinds of rock?" A: Igneous, Sedimentary, & Metamorphic, She is a 4.0 Geology Major attending a respectable University. She simply chooses to express herself through the musical and clothing trends that emerged in 1970's English underground music. In reality it her personal preferences in the aforementioned areas have no bearing on her intellectual or academic standing.

A black, jew, mexican, and american are on the boat. The boat begins to sink. As an idea, they all throw stuff off the boat to try to stay afloat. The black throws off cotton, the jew throws off yamakas, and the mexican throws off sombreros. Then, the american throws off the mexican because there are too many in his country. The mexican drowns. The boat still sinks and the american goes to hell while the other go to heaven.

How do you make a plumber sad? You kill his family.

How can you tell that your friend just had sex with a blonde? The girl he just had sex with has blonde hair.

What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They were baked until the baker them until they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

Why can't Helen Keller drive? Because she was deaf and blind, which both make it very unsafe for her to drive.

In Soviet Russia, table flip you! ???? ? /(. - . \?

How do you confuse a blonde? Speak to her in a nonsensical language of gibberish you have devised without her being able to understand or translate.

you lose.

What has 3 legs? An abnormal human.

What did your mom get for christmas ? A stairstepper.

How do u know the difference between a adam and rappers you dont they r the same

How many blonds does it take to screw in a light bulb? ... It shouldn't take anymore than one person to do this job, regardless of there hair color.

What do you call a man with no arms, no legs, and only one eye? Dave.

what do you call a 2-foot blue scottishman named max? max

If Chuck Norris had five dollars and YOU had five dollars, he could still punch you in the face for free and get ten dollars out of it.

what is the difference between a park bench and a black guy? the park bench is an inanamite object and doesn't have feelings

Teagan Doherty, stop making jokes, thanks

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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