A man walks into a bar. Ouch

thumb_up thumb_down +26

Doctor, Doctor, I feel like there's two of me! There's not. Your long lost twin died of terminal cancer.

thumb_up thumb_down +26

Yo momma so fat when god said let there be light he said get the fuck out the way!

thumb_up thumb_down +26

Roses are gray Violets are gray I'm colorblind.

thumb_up thumb_down +26

What do you call an englishman who wakes up in Africa Confused

thumb_up thumb_down +26

Knock knock. Who's there? 9/11. 9/11 who? Oh my god, I thought you said you'd never forget.

thumb_up thumb_down +26

How did the fat guy die? After an autopsy, it was discovered he was unaware of his type 2 diabetes and therefore did not treat it

thumb_up thumb_down +24

Q: whats better than having sex? A: nothing

thumb_up thumb_down +24

Roses are red, Violets are blue, I suck at poetry, Show me your tits.

thumb_up thumb_down +24

I nicknamed my diick "the truth" because the biitches can't handle it

thumb_up thumb_down +24

What's the difference between Cindy Crawford and a Snickers bar? Nothing. One is a mediocre actress, the other is a peanut based bar of chocolate confectionary.

thumb_up thumb_down +24

When is a Jew the sleepiest? Depends on the time really... some people sleep and wake up on different biological calendars.

thumb_up thumb_down +24

How do you give Salley enough energy swim against the river current? Add your own electric current.

thumb_up thumb_down +24

Knock Knock Who's there? Eat a dick you sh!t fukk! I'm going have to ask you leave now,

thumb_up thumb_down +24

What do Ethiopians do for dinner? Starve.

thumb_up thumb_down +24

I saw a woman get donkey punched in the middle of the street. Nero the clit collector: You know... What is it called when A donkey kinda lifts its front hoove and hits a woman? ...WHAT? DO YOU KNOW HOW MANY PEOPLE STARVE TO DEATH BECAUSE OF YOUR COIN COLLECTION? YOUR STAMPS ARE MURDER! (or something) At least my uh... "Friends" survive... SOMETIIIIIIIIMEEEEEEEEES!!!!!!! ...And then I kill them.

thumb_up thumb_down +24

Farmers are outstanding in their fields

thumb_up thumb_down +24

What do you call a dirty black person? Unhygienic

thumb_up thumb_down +22

Knock knock Who's there? Your brother My brother who? The dead guy over there.

thumb_up thumb_down +22

why did the dog chase it's tail? it has a case of OCD where he was obsessed with catching his tail and would spin until he passed out or threw up.

thumb_up thumb_down +22

What happened to the cat that fell in the bath? It jumped out feeling cold and embarrassed.

thumb_up thumb_down +22

One time I masturbated by myself

thumb_up thumb_down +22

What do you call a black man flying a plane? A pilot

thumb_up thumb_down +22

What do you call a beagle and an eagle mixed together? A beagle.

thumb_up thumb_down +22

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops