What is worse than breaking your pencil? Flying on a magic carpet

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Roses are red, violets are blue! Damn, the florist messed up the colors again!

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Q: whats pink and fluffy? A: Pink fluff.

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Q. Why did the triceratops die? A. A giant meteor hit him.

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Once you buy it, you will get a 365 day warranty or a 1 year warranty, whichever comes first

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gabbi nunez ;)

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Why did the blond girl get fired from the M&M Factory. Becouse she removed all the W's

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Why doesn't Rosa Parks eat bacon? Because she's dead.

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what does a man with no leg say to a woman with one eye? hello. by Mad James

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A man... walks.

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Your mums a penis joke.

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whats purple, extinct, and smells like children? barney

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If i wanted your 2 cents i'd rob you

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Q: Ask me if I read the terms of use before I submitted this joke. A: I didnt

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Q. What do you tell a women with two black eyes? A. Stop pissing him off!

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Roses are violets red is blue i like lizards they have fur

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so a jew walks into a bar and leaves at 9:00 becuase he has work in the morning.

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What happens when Darth Vader farts? Nothing. Darth Vader's butt was burned off on the volcanic planet of Mustafar and he fell into a lava pit. Darth Vader has since started a program called Darth Vader's butt replacement research foundation. Please donate money today. You could be changing a buttless person's life. Thank you very much.

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Why was the human stronger than the dog? Because the dog had four legs and a mouth and a human has 2 legs, 2 arms, and is taller. Therefore, the human has more capabilites than the dog.

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What's green and has wheels? a green car.

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Whats funnier than 24? 25

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Me: Ask me if in a giraffe You: Are you a giraffe Me: no

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How many babies does it take to paint a wall? I don't know it depends on how hard you throw them.

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Why did the first monkey fall out of the tree? Because he was DEAD! But why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? Because he was stapled to the first monkey... But then why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? P-p-p-p-eer pressure

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops