What did one tree say to the other? "Hey Phil, how's it going?

thumb_up thumb_down +9

Why did the boy cry? Because he had a frog stapled to his face. Why did the boy cry harder? Because it queefed in the boys mouth.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

getting up in the morning is the 3nd hardest thing :DDD

thumb_up thumb_down +9

Q:John has 50 candy bars and he eats 45, what does john have? A: Diabetes

thumb_up thumb_down +9

I was watching this one episode of mighty morphin' power rangers ......and i realized i got trapped in the 90's.... THANK YOU BOOTLEG TIME MACHINE FROM .....EBAY......it's always ebay.....

thumb_up thumb_down +9

Why did the woman leave the kitchen? She didn't.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

What did the fat man do when someone told him he was fat? He kept eating, for he was deaf.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

What did walt disney say to the Jew? Nothing. Walt Disney didn't know the man was Jewish and didn't have time to make himself acquainted with the fellow.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

"KNOCK KNOCK". I opened the door to greet my guests for the party.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

yo mamas so cruchy people might mistake her for a cheeto!

thumb_up thumb_down +7

Justin Bieber got laid

thumb_up thumb_down +7

What do you look for in a woman? a pulse.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

why did the deer jump, because there was something in it's way

thumb_up thumb_down +7

A man walks into a bar, and he says, "ow,".

thumb_up thumb_down +7

Whats worse than not coming up with an original anti joke? Nothing.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

one day 2 strawberrys walked to the ice cream store and ordered a small cup of banana ice cream they were realley happy they were later taken in and tortured and raped

thumb_up thumb_down +7

why is a bad joke like a dull pencil? cuz thers no point!!!!

thumb_up thumb_down +7

What's the difference between a fine wine and a dead baby in a blender? One gets better as it ages, and the other is a horrific accident.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

Why did they bury the pope on the side of the hill? Because he is dead

thumb_up thumb_down +7

How do you make a Jew cry? You kill all of their friends and family members.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

Why can't George Washington sit up straight? He's dead.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

why was the pen lonely? because it didn't have a pen pall

thumb_up thumb_down +7

Barack Obama walks into a bar. He's black.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

So you are "The Nero" are you not? How ironic... ...I got nothing on you, let me ask you however, why did you quit the underground society? What changed your lifestyle so much? I mean I accept that you did not do it out of fear or cowardice, but why did you leave it up to the rest of us to try to hold together the last remains of freedom and social information? What? To use your techniques in order to entrance people into buying your books? How is that so different? I am not saying that I consider your methods lesser, because nobody here does, but if you can explain how this makes you better, I would appreciate it, I am certain that most people would.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops