What do you get when you cross professor plum with a candle stick in the library? A dead prostitute. Try and be more careful next time.

Have you heard about the hipster paleontologist? He liked dinosaurs better when they were underground.

What do you get when you cross scabies with genital warts? Krusty Krabs.

What's sad about three black men driving over a cliff?

What did the Jew say the Black man after their meal? "Don't worry, I'll pay the bill."

A man walks into a bar. It was a metal bar. He got hurt.

What did the retarded asian dolphin eat for breakfast? A big bowl of shit

Two muffins are being baked in an oven. One muffin turns to the other and says, "Man, it's starting to get really hot in here." The other muffin says, "MUFFINS CAN TALK?!"

Kid: mom what happens when grandpa farts? Mom: well son... Everyone leaves the room

There are 100 men enjoying a cruise to celebrate an important contract going through at their place of employment. The boat then suffers a major malfunction and tragically sinks to the bottom of the ocean, miles from any land masses. Not a single man died, how is this possible? They all used the lifeboats supplied on the boat and followed the standard procedure to deal with such a crisis.

What do you call a guy with a car on his head? Immediate identification would not be possible. The man would be referred to by his estimated demographics. Circumstantial evidence and dental reports may be required for identification at which points the family's would be notified. Only after this will the man's name would be released to the media who would in turn report this.

So a Quadriplegic walks into a bar.....

What did my wife say when I asked her to pick up some milk on her way home from work? OK

Q:Whats big, red and eats rocks? A: A big red rock eater

Your mom is absolutely pefect. This makes me love HIM.

I could even argue that having blood on your penis is kinda fun sometimes.

What's worse than a joke. ONE TOLD BY FOK.

2 mentally, unstable , woman visit the cinema , and watched "The Sweeney,"they really enjoyed it

Roses are grey, Violets are grey, Everything's grey, I'm a dog.

Roses are red Violets are blue Charcoal is black So is my neighbor

NASA sent a probe to Uranus and wondered why people were laughing.

Why was the man full? He ate a meal.

Yo mamas so tan she might get skin cancer

That's what SHE said!

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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