What did the monkey say to the owner of the world's rarest stamp? Eiiiiijajajaajaja EIIIIJAAAA

thumb_up thumb_down -6

Q. How do you kill 5000 flies? A. Slap a afraican in the face.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

this is not a joke

thumb_up thumb_down -6

If you are riding on a broomstick and it breaks in the middle of the ocean... How many pieces of toast does it take to fill a light house? Purple, because Oranges cannot fly.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding 2 worms in your apple.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

why is red the first color in the rainbow? I don't know go ask a scientist.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Why did the chicken cross the road? It felt like it.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

What do you call someone who takes a toaster into their bath? Adele's number one fan.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? Where's my tractor.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Ipod to earbuds: "hey buds" earbuds response: "sup player"

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Knock Knock whose there? ach ach who? bless you

thumb_up thumb_down -8

So two friends walk into a bar. One says to the bartender, "Get me a Miller Lite please." The bartender says, "Sure." The other friend says, "Get me a Cosmopolitan please." The bartender stares at him and says, "That is not the drink I was expecting you to order, but I respect your decision."

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Why did the black man cross the road? To show the chicken that it isn't that hard.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

WNBA

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Two Jews are on their way to the giant oven, one looks back at the other in fear and says, "I think I overcooked the lasagna."

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Whats white and sticky fluff

thumb_up thumb_down -8

What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? "Where's my tractor?"

thumb_up thumb_down -8

what is purple and smells like poop? very weird looking poop

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Guy 1: "hey look that homeless guy is riding a bike!" Guy 2 " Ya i know and look, there's a dead pro biker other there"

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Two guys walk into a bar the third guy ducks

thumb_up thumb_down -8

What's the difference between Micheal Phelps and Adolf Hitler. Michael Phelps is an Olympic swimmer who has won many gold medals in the 2008 Olympics in swimming races and is considered to be one of the greatest swimmers ever. Adolf Hitler was a terrible man who was the leader of the Nazi party during the World Wars. He ordered to kill eight million Jews, causing what is called the Holocaust. He is considered one of the worst men in human history. Other immature people would say Micheal Phelps can finish races.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a loaf of bread, and loaves of bread are incapable of understanding the intricacies of fly-by-wire guidance and propulsion systems.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Why does a Jew, a catholic, and a buddhist eat pizza? because they like the way it tastes.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

What did one dog say to the other dog? Woof woof

thumb_up thumb_down -10

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops