what did the blind deaf mute boy get for christmas? some nice presents.

If Jimmy has 60 candy bars and eats 50 of them, what does he have? Diabetes.

What is large, white, and can't climb trees? A refrigerator.

"Doctor, Doctor, I feel like a pair of curtains." "Well that sounds like a mental illness and I deal predominantly with physical ailments"

Why did the milkman die? Because everyone dies.

How do you stop a clown from laughing? Drive an ax through its head.

I have Alzheimer. What?

What's worse than molding bread? Babies in the toaster.

why did the boy drown? because water entered his lungs and suffocated him.

On Friday the 13th,I had one of those dreams of when you go to school in your underwear. I then realised it wasn't a dream.

Roses are red Violets are blue Your mom is dead And your dad is too

An old couple walks up to me and says, "can you take our picture? It's our 50th anniversary." I reply, "sure." Then I pull the man to the side and ask, "how do you make a relationship last so long? I can't make one last 50 days let alone years." He leans in and says, "cheat"

Straight men can be bronies.

What did Helen Keller name her dog? Well i would imagine one of various names for a domesticated animal and she would choose the name based on her likes towards nature or an element of nature, being the educated individual she i would think she may name it base on a person of importance, such as an author or maybe a writer that inspires her.

You know how to torture Hellen Keller? -No. Put a plunger in the toilet.

Three men are walking down the street to buy groceries. They then take a left and continue walking towards the store.

What is less sanitary than eating food off of the ground? Anal sex.

Why did the plane crash and everybody die on board? The plane crashed because the pilot was a loaf of bread.

Why is the guy fat? Because he eats too much.

if I was a girl I would be touching my self everywhere if I was a girl as a boy I would make a diffrence in poltics but thats not gonna happen.

what do a fish and wood have in common? when they're dead, they float

A black guy and a white guy are in a drug store. Who buys the drugs? The customers.

What is long and black The unemployment line

What's sad about the Holocaust? well i don't know ,it may or may not have anything to do with you and cause absolutely no sad emotions toward the subject. I for one don't care.........

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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