So, Helen Keller walked into a bar....and then a stool, and then a counter, and then a table....

What do you get when you cross a hooker with five shots of tequila? Herpes

No it doesnt..

Knock Knock Who's there? You You Who? Yes? Can I help you madam?

Roses are red, Violets are blue, That's okay, I'm not colourblind.

Why did the baby die? Lack of oxygenated blood to the brain.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Cancer

What would Osama Bin Laden be doing if he were alive today? Drowning

Roses? are red Violets are blue, Kangaroos like Oranges, Poems suck, Refrigerator.

What happened to the man taking a shit? An unfortunate drop of water splashed back onto his arse

What is long, hard, and full of seamen A submarine you pervert

Where did jimmy go when the bomb exploded.... (Everywhere )

How many Jews can you fit in a car? Two in the front, three in the back, and 278 in the ash tray/\.

I like my coffee like I like my slaves... Free

Why can't Kim and Arnold get childern ? because they are 2 stones.

what did the chocolate bar say to the ice cream cone? nothing: chocolate bars can't talk

Why did the chicken cross the road .... The traffic light turned red

i know the best knock knock joke! you start! other person: knock knock me: whos there ........

Pickup line: Hey babe, do you work at Mcdonalds? Because I don't have a job, are you hiring?

Why can Randy Moss Jump so high? Because he trained to jump high.

what did the poor guy get for christmas POVERTY

Did you hear the joke about the vacuum? It sucks.

What do you do when you find a blonde on her knees? Help her up, because obviously she has fallen.

What happened to Kanye West when he interrupted a KKK ritual meeting? He was promptly hung from a tree for being a negro.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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