person: Ask me if i'm a tree other person: are you a tree? person: no

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What happened when the little girl said Bloody Mary 3 times in the dark? - She got her head smashed in the mirror, all of her intestines were neatly ripped out and was stabbed to death with No.2 mechanical pencils. Then her parents came home from dinner to find their daughter brutally killed in her own room. They notified police, opened a case and gave up after 12 years of searching for her killer. Both parents cried for the amount of years their daughter had been gone and they both decided to kill each other. The father raped the mom while slitting the back of her neck that led to her head being detached. Then the father left his pick up truck running and through his head toward the engine, which didn't really work. So he went back inside and watched Three and A Half Men.

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what will you never loose if you play world of warcraft your verginity

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Roses are red, But ravens are black, Please go to China, and never come back!

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What does a person with Alzheimer's do? To get to the other side.

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What is the difference between a park bench and a Mexican? The park bench can actually suport a family A. Woj

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A Holocaust joke? I did Nazi that coming...Anne, Frankly, I'm quite offended.

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What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? Nothing, he found his tractor and went back to work.

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A blond, a brunette, and a red head are stranded on an island. They all die of starvation.

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Whats worse than a baby stapled to a tree? Holocaust

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Knock Knock Who's there? Sally. I don't know anyone by that name, please go away.

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Knock knock. Who's there? No one, because your house burned down.

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Q.What do you call a man with no arms, no legs, no head, and no blood in his body? A.Dead.

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why has kallum just changed clothes to speak to a counsellor because he's socially awkward and has no peers

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A pirate walks into a bar. The bartender says, "You know, you have a steering wheel down your pants?" The pirate says, "I know, I was just raped by a group of men who thought it would be funny to humiliate me as much as possible. The bartender then called 911 seeing that a horrible crime had just been committed.

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How do you kill a blonde? Stab her with a knife.

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Why did the plane crash? Because something was wrong with the engine

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The one under this is a fake. i wrote the real one

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What did the black guy say when after he jumped in the pool? Wow, its kinda chilly.

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Why did the black guy not tip his pizza driver? Because he didn't order pizza.

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what do grown up's do at night when everyone lese is asleep? Go to sleep as well

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catastrophic anthropogenic global warming

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Did you hear about the Mexican boy scout that helped that old lady cross the border.

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Knock. Knock. Who's there? Banana. Banana who? Are you mentally handicapped? Bananas are fruit.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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