What happened when the blonde girl threw a grenade? The enemy pulled the pin and threw it back

What's black and white and red all over? I don't know either.

Make a man a fire and he'll be warm for a day... set a man on fire and he'll be warm for the rest of his life.

What is White on Top and Black on bottom? Micheal Jackson.

A woman walks out of the kitchen.

Whats better then free candy from a guy in a van? Trying to find his lost puppy so his kids don't cry.

What did Steve jobs tell bill gates? Please pass the salt.

If a chicken and a half lays an egg and half in a half of a day how long does it take a monkey with a peg leg to kick the seeds out of a dill pickle?

Why was billy bad at telling jokes? Billy was sexually abused as a child and humour was never really part of his life

How many pupils does the teacher have? 2.

Blacks

why did the man get arrested? because he was a thief, and thieving is completely unacceptable in a civilised society

"This is Jesus Christ to Tim Tebow. Please leave me alone. Don't you know that my day off, is Sunday?"

Bob: Your mama's so fat, she rolled over four quarters and made a dollar! Todd: YOur mama's so fat, here's a picture of her tied up in my basement. Todd wins the insult war.

What do you call a dog with no legs? A dog.

I worship you Nero, and I wont even begin to explain myself why.

How many pancakes does it take to make a dog house? Purple because, ice-cream has no bones.

Robin, get in the batmobile

Why did Sally fall off the swing? She had down-syndrome

Why did the boy die while brushing his teeth? The toothbrush wasn't water-proof.

How does Lady Gaga like her meat? As a dress.

What is funnier then a dead baby? A dead baby dressed as a clown!

Why did the plane crash? because there were two towers in front of it.

I used to be an adventurer like you, then I took an arrow to the knee and had armor so it deflected off. Then I found out my wife was pregnant.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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