I'm trying to find out how many people in the world have Alzheimers, do you? No. Bananas.

Autism... is not funny at all, it is a serious issue in today's day and age and must be addressed and cured

What's the difference between a melon? One of its halves are both the same.

Executioner: Would you like to make a statement? Mr Murderer: Yes, I would love to sing a song. Executioner: Very well. Begin. Mr Murderer: There were 6 billion in the bed, and the little one said roll over, roll over. So they all rolled over and one fell out...

What do you call someone with no arms, one leg,and an eye patch? names

Roses are red, Violets are blue, I hate rhyming, Vacuum, purple, zebra.

Q:how do you make a rockstar cry? A: hit him with a breifcase

Ian Watkins was excited to attend the opening of the children's ward at the hospital today. It went well and the day was a success.

What do you call a squirrel in my yard? Dead.

kcid gib a evah uoy neht sdrawkcab siht daer nac uoy fi

The Dali Lama walks into a pizza parlor and asks the owner to make him one with everything. After 20 minutes or so the owner brings the Dali Lama a pizza with every available topping. After he finished eating the Dali Lama thanked the owner and left a nice tip.

What are astronauts called in Soviet Russia? Cosmonauts

Your blood is red. Your bruises are blue. I have a gun. Now drag your carcass away from my residence.

Men

What did the Police Officer do after he made a positive identification of a Prostitute? He proceeded to pay her in cash for sexual favors because prostitution is legal in the state of Nevada

What's sweet and tastes like candy? Candy, now get in the van.

Why are roses red ? Ass in my face .

What did the fat kid get for Christmas? Diabetes.

What is worse than biting into an apple and finding a worm? Biting into your grandmother and finding a fish

Rebecca Black

why did the koala fall out of the tree? because it was dead

Its linked with the process of extracting uranium isotopes, but lets change the subject, with that said, I hope you can help me with some management advice such as the one you gave me, I will of course pay you.

-Knock, knock! -Who is it? -Me

What happened to the house that was made without concrete? It fell over.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...