The early bird gets the worm. The rest of them die of starvation.

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Customer: Waiter, waiter, there is a fly in my soup! Waiter: Sorry madam.

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I would write a racist joke, but racism is offensive

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Crowded elevator smell different to midget-Confucius say.

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Roses are grey Violets are grey Colorblindness isn't funny And neither are you

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What do you call your mum without an umbrella? Saturated Fat

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What's the bright side of Jimmy only having one leg? There isn't one.

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Why was the black man smoking marijuana with his friends? He was at a glaucoma support group meeting.

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A man walks into a bar. Then he buys a beer.

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How do you know an elephant has gotten into your refrigerator? The refrigerator is lying on its side and the door is ripped off. The food is all over the place and the shelves are scattered around the floor. Your house will have suffered severe structural damage that insurance plan might not cover. Also there is a mortified elephant in you kitchen.

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What do you call a creepy person trying to break into your house? A robber

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Philosoraptor, turds IM A SPAMBOTz B=Not really, just blind.

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A child wasn't wearing knee pads when he was skateboarding. He proceeded to fall of his board and break his arm

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Abortion.

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if life gives you lemons, you have some lemons

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What's the difference between ten dead babies and a Ferrari. A Ferrari isn't in my garage.

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-Children! Come inside! -Why? -We are going out...

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A black man confronts a small white man on the sidewalk and asks for money. The white man responded "no".

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Roses are red Violets are blue TEST: Are roses red?

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Why did the first monkey fall off the tree? becuase he died Why did the second monkey fall off the tree? because he was stapled to the first monkey Why did the third monkey fall off the tree? monkey see, monkey do

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Why can't Amy winehouse drive? She's dead.

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If all ziggles are zaggles and all zaggles are zumbles, then why is your mother a whore?

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how do you kill chuck norris. you don't

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What's purple and glows? An electric grape

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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