What did the bar say to the man? Nothing, bars can't talk

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Have you seen Stevie Wonder's new house No Neither has he.

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What's the difference between a vegetable and my son? Nothing

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Why did Darren Wilson quick scope Michael Brown? Because he was being attacked, racism is wrong

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What do you call a dog that can't pass an Algebra test? A dog.

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whats white a smells like paint. whtie paint.

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Y did the chicken cross the rode to/ get away from KFC

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Justin with a hat.

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Have you ever had Ethiopian food? Neither have they

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knock knock. who's there? interrupting cow. interrupting cow wh... Your mom's a wh0re.

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What do you get when you cross an orange with a gerbil? A mailbox that lights up when you open it

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It was a free-range chicken

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Why were people laughing when Muhammad Ali signed autographs for his fans? He was making jokes regarding his Parkinson's syndrome in order to elevate an otherwise melancholy experience for the audience.

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What happens when you roll a quarter down the street in Mexico? It rolls for a small period of time but eventually it falls over and stops rolling because quarters aren't able to roll very far on imperfect surfaces.

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Q: What do you call someone who cant swim? A: A person that cant swim.

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How do you confuse a bus driver? Go invisible and throw bananas at him

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Why did the chicken run across the road? It was 9/11

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What's worse than a baby falling? A baby fall in a pit of tar What did the baby say on the way down? "weeeeeee"

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Why did the little girl fall off the swing? Because she has no arms.

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Q: how do you get a live elephant into a refrigerator? A: you buy an industrial sized refrigerator from cost-co and then walk the elephant slowly but surely through the door. Q: how do you get a giraffe in a refrigerator? A: after removing the elephant by means of walking out the door, slice the giraffe into small pieces approx. 1m by 1m by 1m and put those into the refrigerator

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A frog walked into a bar. Except by frog I meant Frenchman, and by bar I meant English pub. The Englishmen in the bar kill the Frenchman in a display of territoriality.

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Roses are car Violets are giraffe this poem makes no sense microwave

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Q: What did the boy say to his mum when he saw a Lion A: Hey mum that's a Lion

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So a man walks into a bar. Well, he trips over it because it was very low to the ground and he didn't see it.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops