A man with a blue house wears a blue shirt and wears blue jeans. Someone from a red house with a red shirt knocks on his door. He is invited in because they are friends and both have a wonderful time.

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How long is a china man?

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A black man and his mexican friend walk into a bar. The black man orders a drink and the mexican gets soda. He is the designated driver

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What's black and white and red all over? A newspaper painted red.

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Sex positions (and other related things), never took off... 1. The 96 2. The mission (impossible) position. 3. The Tangoers party (swingers? The fack is that?) 4.Nasal. 5. Bed waltz (requires amazing dancing skills and multitasking, now they just call everything for "bed waltz" to show off) 6.Blind Date take uno (hard to find two blind people and make sure they meet each other and have a good time by themselves). 7. GILFS take one (I mean there could be many hot grandmas out there, but "Guns Id Like For Shooting", was not too popular due accidents)

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What's the difference between 4 and 6? 2.

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What did the Unicorn do with the Portal gun? Nothing. Neither of them are real.

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Why did Sara fell off her swing? She has no arms. Knock Knock Who's there? Not Sara

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What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

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I'm dressing up as a shia for halloween

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Woman's Rights

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What did the blonde do when she reached the traffic lights? She stopped, as the lights were red.

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what's worse than being chased by a turtle? being chased by an angry turtle

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Why was timmy no longer being bullied at school? The rope said it all! Bitch Died HA

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why did the man lose his testicle? he had cancer

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why did the f a g perform fellatio? because he was a sick c unt

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Holy crap it's a talking muffin!

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Do you like waffles yeah we like waffles do you like pancakes do you like french toast yeah we like french toast dododododod let me get a mouth full. WAFFLES!!!!!!!

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why dont black people go on cruises? there not falling for that one again

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Person 1: Knock Knock Person 2: Why did you just verbalize the onomatopoeic sound of knocking on my door rather than taking the action itself?

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It didnt, it was hit by a car

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Knock knock. Who's there? Ahmadinejad. Well then get the **** away from my door!

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what did the asian father say to his son after getting a c+ on a test? son you are working hard and i know you will do well

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What do you call a white guy surrounded by 5 black guys? The president. -Harrison

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops