John has 58 candy bars. He eats 40, what does John have? Diabetes, John has Diabetes.

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What's the best thing about twenty three year olds? There's twenty of them

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What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

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Why did the little girl fall off of the swing? Because she has no arms. Why did the little child orphan with no arms or legs get for christmas? CANCER and for his birthday A.I.D.S. R.I.P little orphan

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What is Lady Gaga's real name? Who the crap knows?

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Roses are red Violets are blue I have alzheimers Roses are red Violets are blue Cabbage

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A plane crashes in the wilderness on the border of Canada and the U.S. Where do they bury the survivors? I lied. There were none.

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Harold Camping and the May 21st 2011 rapture.....

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Yo momma's so fat she is now a sponsor for Jenny Craig after joining the program and loosing almost a 100 pounds. So I suppose she isn't too fat anymore.

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What does a Jew do when he finds money on the street? He picks it up and is probably happy it was there.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was high.

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So, how 'bout that airline food?

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Why didn't the little asian kid go to his friends party? Because he wasnt invited.

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black people are white when i use night gogles

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Your mom is so fat she's overweight

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What's the difference between a black businessman and a white businessman? Their skin colour.

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And the guy who played Trapper John on MASH wins the coveted 'Last Famous TV Person to Die in 2015' award!!! Woooooooo!!!!

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What do you call a girl who denies that she is one? Justin Beiber

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Q. Whats red and smells like blue paint? A. Wheres my tractor?

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- Do you want to hear a joke? - No. - Ok.

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How do you torture Helen Keller? You put her on a table and slowly pull her limbs off

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What did the framer say when he lost his tractor? Where's my tractor?

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Redcunt? You got to try being nicer if you want a proper answer

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What is worse then finding an apple in your worm? Not a lot.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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