my mom died because she was morbidly obese

How do you make a sandwich? You don't, you have a girl do it for you.

knock knock who's there your family just died your family just died who? -.-

Tunechi

Hey guys! Today is September 10th you know what tomorrow means? Party at my house! ...What? It's my birthday.

Knock Knock. Who's there? Lettuce. THAT'S IMPOSSIBLE! AAAAHHHH!

Why did Billy start crying? Because he was abandoned at a young age- and was bullied since childhood in the orphanage.

How do you make a baby cry? Throw a brick at it's face.

Awesome! I've just received my free minecraft giftcode! >> minecraftnow.us <

A middle aged bald man goes to Chuck E. Cheese with a hood and a lump in his back pocket. He has a somewhat enjoyable time with his offspring and leaves.

What do you call kids born in whorehouses? Poor, poor children.

Why didn't the boy drop his ice cream He was hit by a bus and he wasn't eating ice cream

i hate this glue. give me one new or i will poo.

What did the boy with cancer get for Christmas? An amputation.

text your mom saying you need help, then turn on vibrate and shove the phone up your ass.

Is it colder on a farm than in the winter?

What did the black man say to the other black man? We are both black men.

A man is shipwrecked on a desert island. One day, he finds an old lamp. When he rubs it, a genie appears. The genie says, "You have freed me. As a reward, I will grant you three wishes." The man smacks himself in the face and mutters, "Oh god, I'm seeing genies now. I must be delirious from lack of food and water." Several hours later, he dies.

What's the difference between a piece of chicken and a black guy? They were both once alive and innocent, I lied about the black guy.

YOU

Why can't helen Keller read? She's dead.

Why did the baby cross the road? Because it most likely saw a shiny object and wanted to play with it. Luckily there was no cars passing at the time but the parents should be more careful to keep thier child in sight and away from peril. That and the baby found a small piece of glass that could be harmful to it....

A chicken crosses the road and goes into a bar and recites the following poem: Roses are red Violets are blue Knock Knock Who's there? Sugar is sweet Sugar is sweet who? And so are you. The bartender was confused considering she's a blonde. A genie appears and says to the Mexican he'll grant him 3 wishes. The black guy, the white guy, and the jew were at the bar also. The priest was also drinking. They all had a great time.

bill: HEY! your moma so fat bob:so i dont care shes gonna die soon anyway

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

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