These are some questions you should never ask on a first date: When you wipe do you throw your toilet tissue in the toilet or on a trash can? Do you smell your hands after you wipe? Do you you ever look down when you take a dump and see it come out? Have you ever picked your butt and then picked your nose with the same finger?

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side.

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What's red and smells like blood? Blood.

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What did the cat say to the dog? Nothing, animals are in capable of formal cumunication.

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what looks like a bananna but is blue a blue bananna

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Why Couldn't the pirates see the movie? Because the mall strictly enforced local curfew laws ; and one of the pirates was unable to provide a valid form of identification.

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why was 6 afraid of seven? seven commited statitory rape on a younger 5, gang banged 8, murdered nine, was sent to jail for life, let out early for community service, and told 6 he was coming forhim 6 months later.... 6 commited suicide by jumping off a cliff his body was never found his family didnt get to say good bye thats why 6 is afraid of 7

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What did the boy with no hands get for Christmas? Gloves.

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JOHN to MARY: Roses are red Violets are blue Sugar is sweet So are you MARY to JOHN: Roses are red Violets are blue Who are you? JOHN to MARY: Roses are red I'm your husband MARY to JOHN: No! JOHN to MARY: WHAT??? MARY to JOHN: Ex Awkward silence. Mary moves out the next day.

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Did you hear the one about the man who went into the jungle wearing nothing but leopard print underwear? He was suffering from psychogenic fugue disorder and had no idea who or where he was. He was eventually eaten alive by a flesh-eating centipede. When his wife found out, she committed suicide.

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?u?? ????? ????? '?? p??? o? u?op ?p?sdn s??? p?dd??? no? ??

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What did Batman say to Robin before they got into the car? Get in the car, Robin.

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why did the chicken cross the road? dunno. i wasnt there.

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Whats the difference between a dead baby and a Porsche? I don't have a Porsche in my garage.

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What is the difference between a black guy and a bucket of shit? The black guy is a sentient human being, and the bucket of shit is just a metal container filled with feces

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What's the difference between a cat and a dog? Dogs taste better in stews.

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I see said the blind man to his deaf wife as his crippled son pushed him in his wheelchair.

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Roses are grey Violets are grey I live in Africa Give me water

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how do you confuse a blonde? shes already confused Leave.Her.Alone.

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How you do stop a baby from swinging around on the clothesline? Hit it with a shovel.

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how many black people are... wait stereotypical jokes are for fags

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Why do we need to keep answering encryption codes? Because you can't keep a good Jew down (Wyndellberg)

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Whats worse than finding a giant spider in your bedroom? Loosing it...

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I had a chocolate chip cookie today, thats it, just a chocolate chip cookie.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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