A man claims to own a talking dog. A skeptic approaches the man and his dog and asks for a demonstration. The man asks his dog, "How does sandpaper feel?" The dog says, "Ruff!" The skeptic is not convinced. The man then asks his dog, "Who is the greatest baseball player of all time?" The dog, who like all dogs cannot fully comprehend human speech, proceeds to lick his balls.

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What starts with 's' and ends in 'ex'? S.e.x -XH

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Q: what did the nazi say to the other nazi A: hallo

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A midget walks under a bar

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i have an apple. now suck my dick

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Knock knock. Who's there? Banana. Knock knock Who's there? Banana. Knock knock Who's there? You're in-laws. Bet you wish I said banana

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Roses are red Violets are astronaut This joke didn't make sense I'll kill u with a rake

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what do you call a dog with not legs? it doesn't matter what you call it, its not coming

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Two cannibals were eating a man, one at the top and one at the bottom. The cannibal at the top said, "are you having fun down there?" The cannibal at the bottom said, "yeah, I'm having a ball!"

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I like my coffee how I like my women. Without a penis. - Blake Woodman

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Q: What do you call a cow with no legs? A: Lunch.

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Q: What's worse than eating cauliflowers? A: Eating cauliflowers and getting raped by Jerry Sandusky at the age of 7.

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What starts with F and ends with Uck? F U C K

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There's two homosexuals having sex in the back of a van...........they're over 21 what's wrong with that!

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theres a mexican women and a black man in a car....whos driving? nobody sadly the driver was shot.

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Were did Suzie go after the bombing? A: everywere

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My girlfriend once told me " Life is like a penis, it's hard."

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whats worse than vegetables? Fisting Grandmas

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No really, try this: You: Say "knock, knock" Your friend: OK, knock knock You: Who's there? Your friend: ...... [this awkward pause makes evident the fact that it has now dawned on your friend that he has to generate content for a joke that he wasn't telling in the first place]

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How did the fat woman survive the car accident? She had on her seat belt.

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What do you call an arab flying a 747? A pilot.

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How do you kill a mocking bird. Shoot it.

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i'm funny

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A-S-S-H-O-L-E!!!! Everybody A-S-S-H-O-L-E!!!!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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