Captain Falcon is eating a restaurant. After he sits down at his table, a waiter comes by to take his drink order. Not wanting to skew his blood alcohol level for his next race, he asks for a non-alcoholic drink. The waiter says, "We only have water and punch. Which would you like?" Captain Falcon replies, "Water, please."

What did the dog say to the mouse? Cat

What did the little boy say after he was pushed off the cliff? Nothing. He died, therefore, he is incapable of speaking.

Doctor: "I'm sorry, but your son has Hepatitis B. Asian Parent: "Why he has Hepatitis B? Why he not get the Hepatitis A plus?"

You know what they say about men with big feet? Big penis.

Roses are grey, violets are grey, I am color blind.

Waht do chinease people and gambling machines have in common? They both say chink chink chink chink chink chinck

can people thumb up the evil dead statment below please... its important to me. (and the cup joke below) thanks people , ur great.

Q.What do you call a black man flying a plane? A. A black pilot you racist bastard

what did one black man say to the other black man? hello

Me-Whats long and hard and full of seaman Him-a submarine Me-No dumb ass a dick

why did the lady fall out the window? someone threw axe at her

A man fell off a cliff... He died a vicious death.

roses are red violets are blue oranges are......

A dog is walking down the street. The dog catcher promptly arrives and takes him to the pound. Two months later the dog is in a new, happy home with a wonderful family.

What's funnier than 68? Will ferrel

Tom and Phill are eating ice cream Tom challenges Phill to a contest to see who can eat their ice cream in one bite Tom finishes his in two bites Phil in one Then he looks like he got a brain freeze Tom notices and says "You idiot: you got brain freeze!" Phill turns around and says "No, I have a brain tumor."

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when your cable is on the fritz, you play video games instead. when you play video games, you get good. when you get good, you go to COD XP. when you go to COD XP, you lose to whiteboy 7th st. when you lose to whiteboy 7th st., you get into Skyrim. when you get into skyrim, you reenact cut scenes from skyrim. and when you reenact cut scenes from skyrim... ...you take an arrow to the knee... ...don't take an arrow to the knee. Get rid of cable.

What makes a catholic priest happier then a visit to the penn state locker room? Introducing Jesus to people and them accepting him as their savior.

A daring man proclaimed "Well, here goes nothing!" as his FaceBook status, and all his friends were annoyed.

What do you call a black priest? A black priest

What do you call a group of black people? A group, you racist.

what did the asain have for dinner? A: rice

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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