yo mamas so fat... she's a map on call of duty

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Well, due to the lack of details, there could be many reasons, such as the possibility that there was a cornfield on the other side, he got scared by a loud noise behind him and ran across the street, or just plain old curiosity, but whatever it may be, right now, we do not know the cause.

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all muslims get the fuck out of britain you fucks

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Do you play piano? No

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Why does jim never go to McDonalds? his wife got shot there.

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Sarah Palin, George Bush Jr and Glenn Beck are having a massive orgy with an illegal mexican immigrant, a member of the NAACP and an empathetic selfless homosexual democrat...no condoms were used because only felatio and cunilingus was being performed...

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Why did the chicken cross the road? WHO CARES!!

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what is fat, sweaty, and italian? Italians

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Paul howley can't drive, phahahaha

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how do you make a plumber cry? you kill his whole family

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A man walks into a bar. The bartender asks, "How's it going?" The man replies, "Bless you." The man walks out of the bar, as his peers realize he was honest when he told them a week earlier that he had autism.

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What did the person do at the stop sign? Stop

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A guy walks into a bar Many people gather around him to see if he is alright and to tell him he needs to watch where he is going.

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what do you call a fish with no eyes fsh

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How many hours of sleep did Jimmy get last night? Zero, because he has insomnia. Jimmy got fired from his job today because of his lack of energy and motivation due to his disorder. His wife divorced Jimmy because he can no longer support her and their two kids.

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What makes Stephen Hawking such a lame scientist??? A: he has a disabling disease. It's called ALS.

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*knock knock* "who's there?" "me, the person who knocked..duh"

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What did Santa Clause say to Rudolf? Nothing. Santa's not real.

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What do Texans call cows? Cows. Calling them almost anything else would be utterly illogical.

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What do men and women have in common? They're both respected members of society, besides women.

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What do a platypus and Obama have in common? A brain, except for Obama.

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A black man walks into a bar and is proptly told to leave. He proceeds to sue the bar owner, then buys the bar and turns it into a community center that helps at risk children.

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You know whats retarted? people with down syndrome.

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What's the anonymous name for vampire hunters? The KKK.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops