Police say's 'have you been drinking' and you reply back saying 'YES' then the police brings out the blower and you blow, it says on it that you are fine, but then the cops ask you 'what did you drink' and you just say 'well i drank juice for breakfast then had some water, tea, coffee' the cops get really angry but before he says anything you say that ' I AM MUSLIM'

knock knock. come in.

I've done a lot of soul searching, and.... I've realized.... the & symbol really looks like a man dragging his butt on the ground.

Knock knock. Who's there? Your neighbour. My neighbour who? Timothy, welcome to the neighbourhood!

My penis is small, Just kidding, it's huge.

Chuck Norris walks into a bar. somebody recognizes him and immidiately asks for his autograph

Knock Knock! Oh god Johnny, someones at the door! Hide the heroin and bail man, BAIL!!!

PFF! I hate that shit XD not saying that claymation cant be art, but that Plonsters or whatever is just something I dragged out of my head.

why did the kid get chemotherapy? because he had cancer

What did the girl say when she arrived at the party? "I like what you did with the furniture!"

whats worse than 9/11? 9/12

You know what's never heard of? Father's Day in Camden.

Your mama so fat she is physically larger than other people.

Roses are red Violets are blue Your mom is dead And your dad is too

A Grape Soda inside a Chicken inside a Watermelon. Blackception.

Q: Why did the bird fall out of the tree? A: It was dead Q: Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? A: It was stapled to the bird

Is every Voltorb a terrorist?

Why did the man fall over...he had a stroke!

How many gay men does it take to change a lightbulb? Usually, it takes one gay male to complete this action.

How much cocaine did Charlie Sheen take? Enough to kill Two and a Half Men.

Your mother is so old that she is dead.

girl: why do you love me? boy: i don't.

What eats McDonalds for breakfast, lunch and dinner, annoys everyone around them, and could care less about anyone but themselves? The population of the United States.

How do you keep children off your front lawn? Molest them.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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