Kah-________-

thumb_up thumb_down +10

what is the only death better than asama bin ladin JUSTIN BIEBER'S

thumb_up thumb_down +10

No, but it was a nice chance to pretend to, that was the scheme part I might have mentioned, people never figure out that you are fucking them over at the present, if you tell them you fucked them off in the past, they start thinking backwards, often ignoring those tiny details straight in front of them. Listen, call me a bit paranoid, but who the hell is Septimus and AzureDragon or whatever the fuck his little geek name was?

thumb_up thumb_down +10

Win and Beau have no friends

thumb_up thumb_down +10

Why did the man climb to top of the tower? To push the Jew off.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

A Kid goes to Band Camp and comes back distinctly better at the Trumpet.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

What's brown and sticky? ...A stick.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Wanna hear a great joke? (any answer) Your dad's choice of condom.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

A woman walks into a cave, and the entrance collapses. She spends two days in the cave. She comes close to death, due to lack of nutrition, but is thankfully rescued by a dog walker. She spends several days in hospital recovering. The experience really opens her eyes to life, and she learns not to take her loved ones for granted, and to really make the most of her life. Finally she is allowed to go home. The next day, she is hit by a bus.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

hi do you like guitars? cool i dont

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Why did the bird fall. Its tree got cut down.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

A zombie walks into a bar. It was shot by an M16 automatic rifle. The video game had zombies.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Why did the man rob a bank? Because he was poor.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

What is red, blue, and green all over? A piece of paper with three colors on it.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

A man walks into a pet store. He then says "This isn't the bar" and leaves.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

What is another word for a woman that ends in unt. Aunt.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

A Black man walks into a bar with a parrot on his shoulder and the bar tender says " thats something weird you got there". The parrot says "yeah i found it on the street".

thumb_up thumb_down +6

What do you get when you put white cheese in a blender and turn it on? White cheese.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Electronic Arts is a respectable company.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Its a bird...its a plane....it IS a plane

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Why did the blonde become a cannibal? Because she got hungry.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

what do you sit on, poop on, and sleep on? a bed, a toilet, and a chair

thumb_up thumb_down +6

A black guy, a white guy and a Pakistani are walking together when they see a lamp, They rub the lamp and out pops a Genie who, with only three wishes to grant, lets them have one wish each. The Pakistani wishes that all people of Pakistani origin are returned to their country with health and wealth. The black guy thinks this is a good idea and asks for the same for all Africans and Caribbean's. The white guy says "are there really no more Pakistani's or blacks in the country?" The Genie confirms this is accurate. The white guy is devastated, who will drive the buses, operate the power stations, produce the medicines and work in the hospitals that these people did? I wish for them to be returned.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a tomato

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops