Q: What do Obama and George Washington have in common? A: They are both intelligent, trustworthy presidents who truly care for what is best for the United States. Except for Obama.

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Yeah its just my way of saying that I appreciate you worrying so much about me, you are a sweet girl, Honestly I do not understand why the hell you guys are using Horsehead AntiJoke out of all places, there are far more terrible forgettable sites available, I mean this sites connection suddenly went from disgustingly terrible to fine and dandy, the Feds, the Interpol and even fucking Al Qaeda might be reading every single message, but there is no way in hell anyone can decipher the code format, if they could, they would have done it when I invented it sixteen years ago, Myself mind you, nothing subtle about me today apparently.

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I went to the zoo yesterday. There was only one dog, it was a shitzu

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Why was the bear rushing home after work? Because he was late for dinner.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side.

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What is the difference between a black guy and shit? One just looks and smells like shit, and the other actually is shit.

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Sam alexander is also r8 g4y

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Knock knock. Who's there? It's the police. Your father's been taken to county jail for his third DUI.

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Knock knock Whose there? Interrupting doctor Interr-- You have cancer.

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Why did the plane crash? The pilot was a loaf of bread.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, Some poems rhyme, But this one doesn't.

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*insert joke here*

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How do you get an asian out of a rice field? Napalm.

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anti jokes aren't always funny on here

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penis

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Your mom is so fat because she ate her emotions when your dad walked out, not to mention her history of bulimia as a teenager.

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An Irishman walks out of a bar...

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What's the difference between a cake and Jews? A cake comes out of the oven.

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what did the dinosaur say to the other dinosaur nothing dinosaurs can't talk

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A cup of ranch walks into a lemon

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conrad profit

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A man walks into a bar and brings a Snickers. He gets a beer, eats the candy, and leaves leaving the wrapper. The bartender is angry with the littering but cleans it up and serves another customer.

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How many light bulbs does it take to screw a blonde? 3.

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What did the priest say to Jesus when he revealed himself on Christmas morning? Happy birthday

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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