Why didn't the boy get any presents for christmas ? Because sadly his father is an alcoholic and cant support him nor his family.

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a

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Listen Nero, lol "listen", anyway, you seem pretty quick to take the blame for my mistakes here, I mean sigh... ...I would never send anyone to harass anyone, but then again I should never allowed them to join in the first place, how bad is that eye doing by the way? I am deeply sorry, I never meant for anything like this to happen. I am eating as I write, I mean I am still scared, I would not blame you if you still keep burning anger towards me.

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A blonde, a brunette, and a redhead are walking down the street when they find a genie. They run away in fear because finding a genie out of nowhere is kinda freaky.

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I saw a man lying on the floor. He was dead.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other... Uh oh. A car just ran it over.

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Why did the dog die? I beat him with a bat

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That moment when you touch your balls then sniff your fingers and realize it smells good.

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What's the main reason for divorce? Marriage.

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Knock knock. Who's there? It's the police. Your father's been taken to county jail for his third DUI.

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What should you do if you are locked in the trunk of a car? Yell for help.

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How can you confuse a blonde? Give her a calculus worksheet that she hasn't learned how to do.

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Q: What's funnier than a dead baby? A: Two dead babies.

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sarah taylor

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I'm growing tired of all those ADD jokes. I have ADD, and I... ... what time is it?

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Why did John forget his homework? While driving herself home at 8:00 PM the previous evening, his mother got into a terrible automobile accident. She was rushed to the emergency room, only to find out that one of her main arteries in her right arm was cut. Death was probable for her in the next few hours. John and his father, sitting at home playing a friendly game of chess, were notified of the accident by hospital secretaries. His father rushed John with him to the hospital in his Toyota Camry. Upon arrival, they were notified that John's mother had only a few moments left to live. They ran into her room, and said their last parting words. John's were "I love you, Mom.", and her husband's were "I love you, honey." She then passed away. John began to weep, and his father put his arm around him to try to comfort him, while feeling extreme sadness as well. Around this time, back at home, his dog, Rex, ate his homework that he left on the dining room table. John and his dad then drove back home, crying their eyes out. This kind of sadness they have never experienced before. He will always remember his mom, and love her to bits. His dad, well, he was never really the same after her death. The funeral was scheduled for the next week. John will always remember his mom as being a nice, caring individual with so much love for everyone in the world. Him and his dad later picked out a nice, blue coffin that reads "You will always be missed" on the top of it. They chose it because John's mom's favorite color was blue.

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Two black guys jump off a cliff, who wins? The black guy.

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An Irishman walks out of a bar...

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your a towel.

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What the difference between water and water? Nothing, they're both water.

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How many potatoes does it take to kill an Irishman? None.

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What's worse than an avalanche? Being raped in prison.

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Billy's alarm clock went off at 8:00 AM but Billy was really tired but still his Dad forced him to go to school.

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What happened to the boy who cried wolf? He died.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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