You momma's so ugly your dad left her.

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What do you call a baby who was raped and murdered? Funny

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Roses are Red, Violets are blue, I Love The Music Only Jazz and Blues.

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How do u get an A in algebra? Train a possum.

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Why was the boy with a green and blue collared shirt holding a bottle of rice dead at the bottom of the sea? Because he was pushed of a boat and couldn't swim.

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Q: What did Mr. Spock say when Captain Kirk was raping him? A: "Ouch! Ouch! Captain, this is so illogical!"

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im a selling a car

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Roses Are Red Violets Are Blue A Face Like Yours Belongs In The ZOO. :o

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Transformers: Shadow of the Dark Risen Monday. The Autobots starring in more explosions, more random fighting! Zero narrative nor explanations! One constant explosion trough the whole movie! But do not worry! Did you believe that the final battle versus Optimus Prime and his evil Dimensional counterpart Optimal Evilus would be the ones fighting at standing at the end? NO! This is far more exciting! 16 year old Nick is seeking the love of his life in the 42 year old grandmother Mirabella Torres, and ends up proving his love by pushing the button that instantly kills Optimal Evilus`s ultimate form Evilus Supreme! "WHAT THE FUCK IS THAT?" Honest reviews. "Yeah we love it that part where Optimus Prime forgets who is fighting and beats the shit out of Jazz and his totally non racist MonkeyBot Obamabus, seriously, this needs to die" Transformers lovers. "You gotta love that scene where Megatron starts blowing up his own allies because explosions!" Transformersmoviefans.com. "So why did Optimus Prime refuse to kill his Evil dimensional brother thing? I mean he was from another dimension, why did he go around like "NO HE IS MY BROTHER IN SOME DIMENSION! YOU MUST INSERT THE SPARK INSIDE ME DEEP INSIDE ME NICKY! DEEPER!" People Magazine. "So this time they just made the Decepticon`s weakness a button so small only a human can push it huh?" People... Just people. "MY EAAAAAAAAARSSSS!" MICHAELBAYGAVEMEPTSD.ORG. Moral: Wow it says skynet is watching all the time now at solvemedia, unexpected considering the first thing I posted was the terminator XXXV thing. So, is it some sort of easter egg feature? I mean I would not believe myself if someone told me that.... Which is actually what makes this kinda creepy...

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What is the difference between a black guy and shit? One just looks and smells like shit, and the other actually is shit.

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Hi.

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How do you get a clown off a swing? Hit it in the face with an axe

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Bird jokes are not funny! Crow up!

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A horse walks into a bar and the bartender says .... Hey, you shouldn't be in here; you're a big and powerful animal and any sudden movement could be dangerous for anyone around you. You have sharp hooves and we don't carry anything ergonomically designed for you to actually drink out of ... so, it's probably best that you just go ahead and get out of here. The irishman at the bar says to the bartender: Why are you talking to a horse as if it can understand you? They do not understand the spoken word and do not have the vocal chords to reply.

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What is wrong with this phrase? The next line is false. The first line is true. Answer: llamas

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As if it helps your self esteem: Nothing yet, Be the first to comment.

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A Kid goes to Band Camp and comes back distinctly better at the Trumpet.

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Two rabbis standing at the buffet cart. The first exclaims "Oy vey, those pork chops look good!". The second shrugs, turns to his friend and remarks, "So do your wife's norks".

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Why did Sara fall off the swing? Because she got shot in the heart with a bolt action sniper rifle and died.

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Dude? What. Dude? What! Wheres my car?

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Why did the chicken cross the road? There was a large dog on its side of the road attempting to harass it.

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A baby seal walks into a club...

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Yo mama so fat!... we are very concerned for her health.

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why did the monkey fall out the tree? he lost his grip

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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