What happened when the girl did the splits? She lacerated her vagina.

What did the Englishman say to the Irishman? "I am from England"

A Banana wrote this...

Why did the plane crash? Cause the pilot was a loaf of bread

How many Jews can you fit in an ash tray? 1 million.

what dog doesnt have teeth? A horse.

What is worst than a worm in your apple, the holocaust and everything else? Finding me in your bed (or your mother screaming "help please, no wait its too good I will endure the pain") Rather than Santa`s presents for X-mas. Your friendly Neighborhood and Future ONE AND ONLY EMPEROR R*pist Moral Man:: X-mas is a great way of putting it, after all it is your kind that X-ed Christ... ...As for your mother/sister/Infant/ screaming... Don`t worry, I will come for you too when I am done, it might take a while to violate someone to death though so be patient, because you might end up as a patient... Hahahaha! If you are really FUCKlNG LUCKY!

What do call someone who kills their own children? Casey Anthony

ARE YOU OKAY? Well thanks for asking actually I could be doing a bit better bu... BUSTER WOLF! Moral: No Im adding moral here, I mean why ask people if they are feeling okay before you break then in half?

Help! I'm locked in a anti-joke factory!

Why could the black man not fall asleep? The gunshots outside his home in Compton constantly awoke him

A whale walks into a bar, everyone says Hey, Ashely!

Homework.

Wanna hear a joke about a germ? Sorry I don't want to spread it! -LEts Go Mets!

What is blue and smells like red paint? Blue paint!

I little 3 year old girl said to her dog "You're my best friend in the whole world" AND THEN THE DOG DIED!

How do you get an elephant in pajamas? Elephants are large mammals with several layers of body fat, and pajamas are for humans. there is no purpose in attempting this feat at all.

What's a pirate's favorite color? Depends on the pirate.

Why did the orange drive the tractor? Because he always wanted to go to the moon.

What's worst then the holocaust, titanit and 9-11 4 bee stings.

Why did Susie fall off of the swing? She was hit by an asteroid.

Roses are red, Violets are blue, Cancer.

Whats black and white and red / read all over * a bloody penquin * nun falling down the slairs * news paper * a clumsey panda

Your mama is so stupid she had to go back to school to get her GED in order to get a job that could properly support her family.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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