How do you kill a blue elephant? How? With a blue elephant gun. How do you kill a pink elephant? How? You hold it's nose until it turns blue, then you shoot it with a blue elephant gun. How do you kill a orange elephant? How? You can't, they don't exist. How do you kill a white elephant? How? You tickle it till it turns pink, then you hold it's noose until it turns blue, then you shoot it with a blue elephant gun.

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why did the chicken cross the road? to get to your house knock knock who's there? the chicken

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What did the husband tell his obese wife? I love you honey

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Why din't the boy get a Christmas present? Because his dad go hit by a bus.

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What do you call a bay that got run over by a train? Thomas

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Two gay guys go into a bedroom, in different houses at different times.

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Whats worse than getting negative 5 on your calculus test? Coming up positive on your Chlamydia test.

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How do you fit 100 babies into a bowl? You use a blender. How do you get them out? Tostitos scoops.

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A man goes to lie down on a couch. His wife walks by and sees him, and asks, "what are you doing?" to which he replies, "lying down"

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Why did Rose throw the clock out the window? Because she's a moron.

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What's the deal with airline food? It's nourishing matter that sustains life, provides energy, and promotes growth distributed by flight attendants.

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What do You call a black porn star from alaska? By their first or full name depending on your relationship with them and the situation.

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Why did the blonde buy a condom? Because she had a penis.

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why didnt the dog bark? he died in his sleep

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Once you go black you may be more open to dating a second black person.

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What do you call a cat with no legs and an inverted anus? Nothing, you're to horrified to speak.

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People talk about how there grandparents was in the holocaust well my grandpa was to he died. How he fell off the guard tower.

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What's long, hard, and full of semen? a penis.

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Uh, erm, uh...I don't know.

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Jacob Edwards has friends.

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? It wasn't. Numbers don't have emotion.

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A black man accidentally walks into a white man. They apologize to each other and carry on with the rest of their day.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Loss of habitat.

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What do you call a black man on the moon? An astronaut.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops