A black man walks into a store and grabs something off of a shelf. He walks briskly towards the door and pauses, looking sneakily left and right to make sure nobody else is around. He also looks and sees that the security camera is not facing him. Seeing as nobody is watching him, he quickly turns towards the counter beside the door and pays for the item with his own debit card, knowing that nobody can see him enter his PIN.

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What do you call Morgan Freeman on a bad day? Samuel L. Jackson.

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A man has 72 cookies, he eats 64 of them. What does he have left? Diabetes.

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A cat fell out of a really tall tree. It didn't land on its feet.

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What do you call a chicken who eats chicken. Cannibal

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it is common to find chickens and other wild and/or domesticated animals roaming through the streets in a multitude of countries.

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Whats orange and looks like an orange? An orange.

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What happened at the finish line of the marathon? People collapsed in exhaustion, it was a marathon.

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My sister has to take a dump

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How do you start a Mexican parade? Close off the streets you plan to have the parade on, and be sure to have a decent amount of floats and marching bands.

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Two women were sitting in silence.

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Why did the women keep scratching her head? Because she had lice

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Which way do gay people walk? in One Direction

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Roses are red, Violets are blue. Who the hell named a blue flower "violet"?

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wanna hear a joke?... Womens rights

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Why doesn't Rick Moranis come out with anymore movies? He left the film industry in 1997, six years after the 1991 loss of his wife, Anne, to liver cancer.

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You hear about that old man that died on the news? It was my grandfather... oh...

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What did the man say to his wife? Go make me a sandwich!

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A black man and a mexican are in a car, who's driving? The mexican, the black man broke his arm and the mexican is driving him to the hospital.

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Your argument is invalid, but I will allow you your opinion nonetheless.

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*Hands women baby* Women: Hes so beatiful! I'm going to love him forever! Doctor: Its not yours, yours died.

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Why can't Ray Charles read? Because he's black.

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what do you call a dead baby in a blender? child abuse

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What does Lady Gaga call Hitler? Nothing special because she doesn't refer to him in everyday's speech.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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