What's nappy,brown,intoxicated,and stealing my bike? A Blazed, black guy that stole my bike.

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Roses are Red I shit in your Stew When you eat it The joke is on you

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Why did the boy have to ride the bus? Because both his parents died.

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Why would you kill a black man? Well, murderers have different motives, the most common of these are revenge or a psychological illness.

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What did the boy with cancer get for his birthday? Roses on his tombstone.

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Why did Timmy drop his ice cream cone? Because a skyscraper landed on him. Yes. A skyscraper.

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There are two men on a dock. The first man says, "What's your name?" The second man says, "GET OFF!" because he has turrets.

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Why was the man so angry? Because the woman was not in the kitchen

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When the going gets tough... Commit suicide.

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A squirrel asks an apple where is the nearest gas station. The apple doesn't reply.

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Knock Knock The occupant uses their peephole and realizes it is a familiar face then proceeds to let them in.

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What do you call an animal with 4 legs ? A dog...

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If a banana is a vegetable, how come your mother gets confused when I stick pretzels in my butthole?

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead, ok!

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A man walks into a bar with an octopus. He tells the bartender that his octopus can play any instrument. The bartender gives the octopus bag pipes. The octopus fiddles with the bag pipes but can't seem to play them. The man gives the bag pipes back to the bartender and leaves with his octopus. He is quite embarassed and decided to get bagpipe lessons for his octopus.

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Dick Cheney That's the joke

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a potato walks into a bar. people stare as it is physically impossible for a potato to walk since it is a vegetable

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Yo mama's so fat she threw a rock at the ground and missed.

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Yo mama so fat that you should maintain strong eye contact with her and not look at her body.

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Why did the black man go to the back of the bus? The only unoccupied seats were back there.

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Have you seen Stevie Wonders new house? No. Well, neither has he.

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What is wet, white and sticky? Glue, of course.

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knock knock whos there micheal jackson too soon

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What's worse than a worm in your apple? Two worms in your apple.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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