To girl in a bar: Grab your coat love... It's cold in my basement.

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Fill in the _________ Ans: Cup Posted By: Lram

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Why did the blind kid hit the other kid in the face? He was trying to give him a high-five.

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How do you drown a blonde? Keep her head under water for 2 minutes because thats when the human brain starts to loose oxygen.

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What's the difference between a Porsche and a pile of dead babies? Lots of stuff.

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A skeleton walks into a bar and orders a beer and a mop.

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Q: What's wrong with the world today? A: Everything

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Johnny just finished his pie.

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How do you kill a blonde? I don't. Murder is a crime.

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roses are red, violets are blue, I have a gun, get in the van

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Why did the baby cross the road? I don't know but it got hit by a semi during.

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how do you get a girl to stop ignoring you? you kill her family with her watching.

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Do you know what's funny about the holocaust? Nothing, it was an unspeakably evil act by a deranged man who should never have been given the power to command a nation

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Want to know who gets head a lot? Balloons

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Q: why did the boy fall off his bike? A: he wasn't very coordinated

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What did susan boyle say when she saw a 10 year old boy get hit by a bus? "OH MY GOD, SOMEBODY RING AN AMBULANCE"

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What did Niel Patrick Harris do after coming out of the closet? He grabbed his jacket and went for a delightful stroll in the park.

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How do you keep your dog warm? Put antifreeze in its water dish.

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Yesterday I caught my 4year old son shaving, trying to be like his dad. Sadly, he accidently sliced through the main artery supplying blood to his brain and bled to death in my arms.

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A duck walks into a bar and says he needs to buy a hammer. The bartender tells him that he's probably looking for the hardware store across the street. The duck realizes that he's disoriented again and should listen to his wife's many pleadings to get back on his medication.

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Why was six afraid of seven? Because seven was wearing a shirt depicting a skull, something six had an irrational phobia of.

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A jew, a black man, an Irishman, a Scotsman, an Englishman, an American, and a muslim walk into a bar. They discuss their racial, political and religious opinions and walk away after a pleasant evening.

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theres a fat guy

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Like my status for a tbh?

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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