What did the lady say after she returned home from the grocery store? "Oh no! I forgot the milk!"

Knock knock. Who's there?

Aye I heard somethin about yo mom WAT!!!!!!!!! She a bop

why didnt Tim Tebow go to church? He had practice half an hour before the service was scheduled to start, and to do both was impossible and missing practice would have resulted in disciplinary action from both his coaches and his teammates.

How many gun shots does it take to kill you? 1..2... 3...4... Samantha reapeatedly kept shooting her enemy until she noticed that her enemy was Chuck Norris. So how many gunshots does it take to kill Chuck Norris? The world may never know.

Q: Why didn't Jane cross the road? A: Because Jane is a figment of my imagination and therefore has neither the physical capability to cross this so called "road" nor the initiatory motivation to do so...

Guy 1: why are you being such a douche? Guy 2: cause douches get the most pussy

what's worse than a pile of dead babies? a pile of dead babies with a live one at the bottom eating its way out.

What do you get if you cross a human and a cow? Arrested.

What did the cripple wish for when he saw the shooting star? A toothbrush.

A man walked into a bar. He stayed for a bit and had a good time.

Insert joke that isn't even an anti joke = The new jokes on anti joke now.

What was the last thing to go through Kurt Cobain's mind? His teeth.

What's the difference between a black man and a bench? A bench can support a family

Boy: Did it hurt? Girl: (sigh) Did what hurt? Boy: When you broke through the Earth's crust emerging from hell.

How do you tell a clown his fly is open? Say sir your fly is open. Then beat him with a pipe until you cant tell what used to be his face.

edmond alward. handyman services. call 0858430803.

An asian man, a black man, and a white man walk into a bar. All three of them order a scotch, coincidentally this is their favorite beverage.

Do they have a fourth of July in England? Yes, but it is just a sad reminder to them that all the cool people left for America.

Three people are stranded on an island. They didn't want to eat each other because they were friends. They died of starvation.

whats worse than nailing 8 babies to 8 trees? nailing 1 baby to 8 trees.

Why did Elmo get depressed? All his friends sacrifised themselves to satan

Why does a squirrel have the tail at the back? Because at the front it's the squirrel.

Why did the chicken cross the road? He was at a crosswalk and had the right of way to on coming traffic

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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