Why Did Suzie fall of the swing? She has Polio and will die the Next Day

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Your mother is average.

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Why is the young Chinese boy crying? Because he is being raped.

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Why did the little girl fall off the swings? Because at the climax point in the swing, gravity is making a much larger affect on you because you are pulling farther away from the earth as well as positioning your body in a way where it is awkward and unstable to support your body, which greatly increases the chance of you falling off and landing on the ground.

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What's blue? The sky.

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What did Santa give little Susie for Christmas? Nothing, he raped her.

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Roses are red. Violets are blue. You're a virgin.

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you go up your hole down your hole between your hole and you rock and roll

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What is pink and fuzzy? Pink fuzz

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What's the difference between a black man and a couch? One is a human being and one is a piece of furniture.

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What's the worst part about eating a vegetable? Putting her back in the wheel chair.

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What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? Wheres my tractor?

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Martin Skrtel walks into a bar The bar breaks, Martin then pays for any damages caused

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Q: what do you call a guy with no arms and no legs floating in the ocean? A: A very unfortunate individual.

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what do you call 2 walking Arabs with long beards? pedestrians.

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Why do firemen wear red suspenders? To keep their pants up.

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Why did the retirement home go out of business. There was a fire and all of the residents charred to death accept for a couple who escaped but were too traumatized to return to the old folks home.

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What's the difference between a pile of dead babies and a Lamborghini? I don't have a Lamborghini in my garage.

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Why couldn't Hellen Keller drive? Because she was blind, not to mention deaf and mute.

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What's funnier than cancer? Just about anything. There's nothing funny about terminal illnesses.

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Knock knock. Who's there? I am. I am who? I am pregnant.

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How many women does it take to unscrew a light bulb? Usually just one, and a ladder.

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What did the elephant say to the other elephant? Nothing. -Albert Einstein... LOL JOKES my name is PJ.

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How many lesbians dose it take to finish a pizza? One or unless she invites some freinds over.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops