My computer crashed today I was watching porn.

What do you call a black man in space? An astronaut.

Today I wanted to make world peace.... So I killed everyone.

Why did Susy fall off the swing? Because she had no arms. Knock knock! Who's there? NOT SUSY!

Roses are Red Violets are Blue I got to go now Gonna take a poo.

A man told his daughter not to give his dog coffee. His daughter turned and told him that she was his nurse and his alzheimers is getting worse.

Why cant jonny walk? He has no legs.

Your Mother is so ugly that men tend to avoid her.

why did the monkey fall out of the tree? because it was dead why did the dog fall out of the tree? because it was attached to the monkey

Knock knock. Whos there. Your landlord. Your landlord who? Bitch, i'm here with your eviction notice you haven't paid rent in weeks

Three men walk into a bar and suffer permanent brain damage

Once upon a time, A lonely man was living in the woods. He died of exhaustion, dehydration, starvation, and bacterial infection. The end. Once upon a time, Another lonely man was living in the woods. He built a house, made a well, made a farm, got married, had kids, and had a wonderful life. The end.

Two guys went to a bar, and the bartender said, hey you guys want to hear a funny joke? "Sure" said the guys. The bartender started telling: Anyway, there was this time two guys at a bar, and the bartender said, hey you guys want to hear a funny joke? "Sure said the guys" At this point, the bartender started telling: Anyway, there was this time two guys at a bar, and the bartender said, hey you guys want to hear a funny joke? "Sure said the guys" At this point, the bartender started telling: Anyway, there was this time two guys at a bar, and the bartender said, hey you guys want to hear a funny joke? "Sure said the guys" At this point, the bartender started telling: Anyway, there was this time two guys at a bar, and the bartender said, hey you guys want to hear a funny joke? (when you are done start reading from the top again, and don't stop ever)

Johnny tried talking to his dog, there was no response.

Knock Knock! Who’s there? Alligator! I'm positively sure that Alligators are unable to talk, now please tell me who this is before I call the police.

person: Ask me if i'm a tree other person: are you a tree? person: no

I saw a woman get burned alive on the news... That woman was my mom.

Why did the kid lay down? Because his legs were chopped off

Where's my tractor?

What's more exiting than watching football Escaping through the underground railroad

Roses are red Violets are blue There's nothing else I want to say

what worse than bitting into an apple and finding a worm bitting into a worm and finding an apple

2 moose sitting in a tree, suddenly there came a boat and landed in the tree next to them, then said one of the moose, he probably lives there

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because there was a red light and it was his turn to cross.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...