After pursuing a speeding vehicle for 10km at speeds ranging from 120 - 160km/h, the police officer managed to stop the driver. The driver of the vehicle rolled down the window and asked, "What seems to be the problem officer?" to which the police officer replied, "It sounds like one of your cylinders is firing incorrectly, you have a fairly large amount of carbon build-up on and around your exhaust pipe."

Q: Why did the Jew fit in with the White people? A: Because he, and his compatriots, have accepted the view of Judaism as a religion, and perhaps a lifestyle -- but not a race.

How did the retarded, blind child win the Special Olympics? He didn't, he died of terminal lung cancer the year before. R.I.P.

Have you seen Hellen Keller's children? No. They look just like her.

Why couldn't the Egyptian pharaoh solve the Rubik's Cube? He didn't know how.

What's long and really hard? The fourth grade.

Why did steve cry? Because he got punched.

Why did the man wear his jacket because he was cold

Why did the plane crash? The pilot was a loaf of bread.

What is green and has wheels? Grass. I was just lying about the wheels part.

too bad about that wild ball, you otherwise played a fantastic softball game"

what did the bug say when it got ran over by a car? NOTHING, bugs can't talk

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because he was dead

What did the blind deaf kid get for Christmas? Cancer.

What do friends and trees have in common? They will fall over if you hit them repeatedly with an axe.

What's the difference between Michael Jackson and Neil Armstrong? Neil Armstrong was the first man to WALK on the MOON. And Michael Jackson was a child molester.

A 2 lb ball and a 10 lb ball are dropped at the same time. Which hits the ground first? They both hit the ground first. Go ahead and try it. Go on. Now. If you are still reading you really want to know if anything else is going to happen. Well nothing exciting. Just a potato. 0 looks like a potato

Hello? Hi. Who is this? Yo mom. Your not my mom. Im the Irish man that did your mom.

Knock Knock Who's There? Jehovah's Witness

What's worse than dying in the holocaust Dying on the last day of the holocaust

I walked up to my friend who's a drug addict holding a can of coke. I then told said friend that I liked the smell of coke. My friend then went on to snort 27 Kilos of cocaine.

Knock Knock. Who's there? James. Ok.

What did the guy say to the mushroom? You're a fungi

How do you say "Hello" in India? 1. Get a plane ticket and fly to India 2. Say Hello in India

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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