Why did the bird fall down? It got shot.

how do you make a door cry? twist its nob

Q:What do African American men call the Internet? A:The Internet

What do you call a mexican doing drugs? An average pablo

A blind man walks into a bar. Nobody is surprised.

Q: what's better than ice cream A: not having aids

Why are bowling balls racist? They are not because bowling balls are incapable of having feeling therfore they cannot have racial thoughts or actions.

Jesus walks into a hotel, slams four nails down on the counter, and says, "Put me up for the night!" The concierge looks at him and says, "You're not Jesus. Jesus was brutally murdered approximately 1,970 years ago. And although I may not be a believer, his teachings have brought comfort and solace to millions of people around the world. Nor do we accept nails as payment. Please remove yourself from the premises or I will call security."

Stephen Hawking wheels into the Center for Theoretical Cosmology.

Why did the Chicken cross the road? Because, the Farmer had treated the Chicken and the rest of his family with great distaste, thus angering the Chicken to the point of rebellion against the Farmer with hopes of inspiring the other abused farm animals to act likewise.

Whats smells like a banana and is purple? A banana, I lied about the purple thing.

What is grey and transparent? An elephant in a zip-lock bag.

Why did the boy throw the clock out the window? He was severely depressed.

Why did Devon move out of his mom's house? His mom beats him.

Why did the boy get hit by the bus? He didn't check both sides before crossing

What do you call a fish that isn't moving? Dead.

Who likes to be fisted? Sock puppets.

Why couldn't the dumbass go to colledge? He couldn't open the door.

Why was the girl crying? She had just been severely raped.

A boy walks into a bar. Because he was under-age, security kicked him out as soon as possible and alerted his parents.

chuck norris

What is the difference between a rock and a pencil? Your Mom.

3 men are stranded on an island when they come across a brass lantern. The rub it and nothing happens. They all starve to death a day later.

justin bieber: ask me if im a boy are you a boy? no.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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