What's the difference between an ostridge? It can neither fly.

What's black and is as fast as a car? A black car.

Why is Helen Keller a bad driver? Because she is blind.

Why is there no gambling in Africa? Because there's no money in Africa.

What do grass and cows have in common? They both say "moo" except for grass

What happened to the deaf, dumb, and blind kid? I don't know. Niether does he.

trumpy trumpy trump

How do you put a bananna in a mini-van? Walk up to the mini-van and stick it in the backseat.

What's the difference between a woman and the Universe ? One is full of mysteries mankind may never understand, the other is, well, the Universe.

Why did Johnny lose the race he got jawed by a pack of chimpanzees

Why did suzie fall off the swing? Because She had no arms. Why did suzie fall off again? Becauze Jimmy was trying to snipe her in the head the first time

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because he has an abusive farmer and needs to get away before it gets any worse.

A black man, a jewish man and a white man walk into a bar. The black man shoots the bartender, the white man takes the money and the jewish man holds the customers hostage.

Why was maddison sad Becasue he was born with a fucking gay name

Have you ever tried Ethiopian food? Neither have they.

Two women are sitting next to each other in a bar minding their own business.

What did the onion say to the the the other other onion Ima cut you fool and make yall cry

What do you call a pig that does karate? By its name. Pigs are often referred to by something regarding the 'Oink' sound that they make. Perhaps in this instance, the pigs name was Oinky. However, this is only a supposition. The range of names is really too wide to make a fair prediction.

How do you get a jewish girls number check her wrist

Whats worse being raped by jack the ripper or being fingered by captain hook

A:Knock knock B:Who´s there? A:Beat B:Beat who? A:Beat your ass if you don´t open that door!!

What did the three sixteen year old boys do to the homeless man late at night? Wished him a happy birthday and gave him a meal

How do you piss off a teacher? Accuse them of being a pedophile

If i open this door you can go trough it

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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