Did you just admit being considerate? I do not care about who gets the last comment anymore, I need to tear my face away from the screen ASAP.

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Confucius say: Man who fart in church probably has a medical condition and should not be made fun of because that is cruel.

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Why black people are so good at football? Because they have white feet.

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What do you get if you cross a canine and a sheep? A Sheepdog. What do you get if you cross a cat and a dog? You fucking stupid? It cant be done!

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call me maybe.

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There was once a guy who was so crazy...he was sectioned.

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If a tree falls in the forest, and only a deal man is there at the time, does it make a sound? And what are his odds of not being trapped under it, awaiting rescue?

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What did the ocean say to the black guy? Nothing, it just shot him.

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Your Momma is so old, she started exercising more and eating healthier to increase the chance of her living long enough to enjoy your own children's lives.

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How do you get a man out of a box? Blow the box up

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A man walked into my repair shop asking why his TV didn't work. I told him it was broken.

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Why did Sally fall off the swing? She had no arms Knock knock Who's there? Certainly not Sally

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Why was the hiker upset? He was plummeting 1,500 feet to the ground after tripping on a rock too close to a cliff.

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Why did the beaver cross the road? To meet Justin Bieber!

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Why did the kid fall? He got pushed off of a building

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This is a shovels and rakes conversation. No hoes allowed.

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Hahahahaha your nan had HIV and died.lol

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What's brown and sticky? A Stick

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Steve Mullings isn't on drugs

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A man with tourettes walks into a bar, due to his disease he shouts unexpected profanities across the room; everybody in the bar bursts into laughter. The man cannot handle the pressure anymore and goes home. He opens a drawer in his bedroom and pulls out a gun and points it at his head. HIs wife of 15 years walks in on him about to commit suicide. She is horrified. He then looks at her and then down, and notices his one and only daughter by the age of 7 is by her side. The man ponders his reckless decision he was about to conceive. Moments later he and his family are holding one another sobbing in each others arms. A few days later the man diagnosed with touretts then goes back to the bar and shoots everybody there. After he killed everybody he curled up into a ball and regretted his decision. An hour later the police arrived and he was sentanced to life in prison for 3rd degree murder. His wife moved on and started a new family with his former best friend, and his daughter vists him every first tuesday of every other month. The man with touretts still cannot control his ticks and rots in jail everyday screaming obscenities for the rest of his life with no parole.

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What did the paper say to the pen? Nothing, they are inanimate objects!

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if you like, i will tell my crush maddy i love her, just kidding i wont do shit.

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2 big black men walked up to me with baseball bats. they politely asked me if i wanted to join their friendly game of baseball

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If it wasn't for my horse I'd never go to college.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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