what do u get when two cars collide... a bunch of mexican

thumb_up thumb_down -8

What do you get when you stab a four year old in the chest 57 times A dead body

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Why did the chicken loom the road? To unlock the final boss.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

What is the difference between an African and French person? Nothing all people ate equal.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Whats worse than getting raped by a giant scorpion? Getting raped by a giant elephant.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

Why was Hellen Keller a bad driver? She was a woman.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

A plane carrying an Englishman, an Irishman, and a Scotsman is destined to crash unless some weight is lost. First they drop the spare engine, but there is still too much weight. Then they drop the luggage, but still there is too much weight. All three men then jump out. The plane crashes anyway.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

is the glass of milk half empty or half full it is scientifically proven that these are the same thing. Choosing one over the other is like saying that 1/2 does not equal 1-1/2. A normal person would just see this as an ordinary glass of milk.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

what does a granny look best in? 1950

thumb_up thumb_down -10

The WNBA

thumb_up thumb_down -10

Elizabeth Warren

thumb_up thumb_down -10

What is red,brown and stinks? A deer that's hit by a car

thumb_up thumb_down -10

canada

thumb_up thumb_down -10

whats chinese noodles

thumb_up thumb_down -10

what did the guy say to the other guy? nothing because right before he was going to say something he was hit by a truck and got knocked out for 11 hours and right before he was going to wake a plane crashed into the hospital and everybody died except for two gay guys.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

Whats the best thing about chuck norris? he's chuck norris.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

The Israeli asked the Japanese guy to open his eyes The Japanese guy said, I'm not squinting you crazy Jew. You're the one that sold me these cheap glasses.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

what happened when the chicken crossed the road? it didn't the hunter shot it

thumb_up thumb_down -10

A man walks into a bar. He suffered concussions later that night.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

how do you make a plumber cry kill his family LOLOLOLOLOLOL

thumb_up thumb_down -10

And more;

thumb_up thumb_down -10

A duck walks into a 7-11 and says "Give me some Chap-stick, and put it on my bill!" But the cash register attendee doesn't speak English and cannot understand him. He does, however, question whether his God is punishing him because, as all people know, Ducks cannot speak. However, this hallucination must be punishment for a horrid misdeed. The employee breaks down into tears and begins reciting a prayer. The duck, slightly miffed, walks out, pondering why he'd need Chap-stick anyway, since he has no lips.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

The audience was ready, the stage was set, as soon as the show ended, the actors applauded towards the audience shouting ENCORE! The audience paid and went home, then they suddenly went... HEEEEEEEEEEEEEEY! WHAT THE HELL IS WRONG WITH THIS SCENARIO!? They cared so much about one another, that they wanted to fall in love with each other. Now that is true love that is not love people! Nerometal (Ironically my name is Nero, I bet the Neronism guys name is Dwayne Maskdork or something, seriously...)

thumb_up thumb_down -10

1,2,3,4,5... 6.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops