How many elephants can you fit in a car? depends how big the car is!

Knock knock! Who's there? Luke. Luke who? Leukemia.

A police officer stops a blonde for speeding and asks her very nicely if he could see her license. She replied in a huff, "I wish you guys could get your act together. Just yesterday you take away my license and then today you expect me to show it to you."

What did the farmer say when he lost his truck? Wheres my truck?

Who killed the ears of every human being? -Rebecca Black

What's green and looks like a red apple? A green apple

Haikus are awesome, but sometimes they don't make sense. Refrigerator.

What did the Nazi put into the oven? Bread.

Hi

Ya know what's sad? You can only submit one dislike on this website.

What do you call a black man who flies a plane? A pilot, you racist.

What's brown and smelly? Poop.

Q: How much does it cost to have 50cent and Nickleback perform together? A: 45 cents, because its 50 cents, and you get a nickle back

What did the the boy get from his grandma for Christmas. Nothing. she died a week ago.

A duck walks up to a lemonade stand. He orders a lemonade and leaves promptly

why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't it tried but was hit by a truck at the halfway point.

How many light bulbs does it take to screw a blonde? 3.

Why did Paul Walker cross the road? He wasn't wearing his seatbelt.

What's neon green and has 69 legs? Nothing that I know of, but it would be an interesting creature

Why couldn't Helen Keller drive? because she was SHITFACED!!!!

Why does life suck? Because it does

When I get aroused I get a solid snake

Xbox One

What crime does a tree commit in order to be sent to prison? Trees on.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...