*Knock Knock *Whos there? *ADD *ADD Who? *I forgot but you wana build a fort.

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'l give you a nickle to tickle my pickle i'l give you a dime to take you time

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What's worse than a pile of dead babies? There's an alive one at the bottom what's worse than that? He ate his way out what's worse than that? He enjoyed it

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A blind Man walks into a Bar. A young man quickly runs over to him and helps him up.

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A Boy Walks Up To A Frog At the Bus Stop And Says, “Why Are You So Upset?” And The Frog Replied, “I’m Waiting For The Bus Because My Car Just Got TOAD!”

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Wanna hear a joke? No.

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What happened when a man drove up to an escort and said "want to check my bags?" The escort replied "Certainly, sir" due to the fact the escort worked at a hotel.

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(SPOILER ALERT) The following are a few punchlines: "I didn't know what you did, but I stepped on a duck!" "I can't believe I just blew thirty bucks!" "Hold on buddy, I'm about to save you $10,000" "To get to the other side!" "Because 7, 8, 9!" "She had no arms!" "A fridge!" "I don't have Ferrari in my garage!" "The clown can stay, but the Ferengi in the gorilla suit has to go!" "And if it wasn't for my horse, I wouldn't have spent that year in college!" "It was stapled to the chicken!" "I proved it to him." "The holocaust" "Red paint" "A stick." "I wished for a big orange head." "No." "A bicycle is an object and a black man is a human being." "A pilot." "The papa tomato steps on him and says ketchup." "You left your engine running!" "That's what she said." "TV watches you!" "I think so Brain, but where will we get that many cucumbers at this time of night?" "Rectum? Damn near killed him!" "One but it takes two episodes and the bald guy dies."

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Coffee just isn't his cup of tea.

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Billy Cundiff.

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What did the unicorn say to the man.\ Nothing unicorns don't exist

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Did you hear the one about Helen Keller? Neither did she.

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your mamas so fat her weight is 3.14 without the decimal

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How many licks did it take for the little boy to get to the center of the Tootsie Pop? Three, and then he choked and died.

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Whats the quickest way to a woman's heart? A bilateral incision on the upper left region of the sternum.

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-What do you call it when a female and male are together? - A very serious relationship.

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Whats worse than runing over a box of kittens? Runing over two boxes of kittens.

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Why did the New York Times cancel Otis Redding's subscription? Because he died.

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What did the vegitarian order for dinner? Vegatables

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WNBA

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Is every Voltorb a terrorist?

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So a blonde woman gets into her car. She then drives to the grocery store because she is hungry and wants to buy food to make her dinner.

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What do you call Michael? A homosexual person who is nice, however he is still gay.

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Yo mamas so stupid that she has a condition called autism

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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