Knock knock. Who's there. Alex. Alex who? Your brother Alex. Oh, please come in.

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There is a young boy called Clive, and his dad asks him what he wants for his birthday: "I would like one yellow golf ball please dad" he said. Of course, his father was quite surprised by his son's request, but nevertheless, he got him a yellow golf ball for his birthday. A few years later, clive does amazingly well at school and gets all As in his final exams. Filled with pride and love for his son, his father says to him: "I can't begin to tell you how proud i am of you, Clive. In fact, you can have a preasant! What do you want?" Clive thinks for a moment. "i would like one hundred yellow golf balls please!" His father was a bit annoyed at his strange request, but neverrtheless, gave Clive his yellow golf balls. A few years later, Clive wins the gold medal at the olymics for the 100m sprint. His father is very proud: "Son, i am so happy about the way you've turned out. You make me so proud. Is there anything you want me to do for you?" "can i have 1000 yellow golf balls please" Now his father got annoyed, he thought Clive was taking the piss. Eventually though, he calmed down and got clove the golf balls. Unfortunatley, Clive gets diagnosed with a deadly disease. His father is heartbroken. And as clive is lying on the hospital bed, his father moves close and speaks to him. "Son" he said, tears welling up in his eyes, "I just want to ask you one thing." "Ok," Clive said, as he too started to get emotional. "Why on earth did you want all those golf balls?" Clive looked deep into his father's eyes, as he took his last breath said: "I wanted them because- ack -splutter- ack" And he died.

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Women's sports.

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What's funnier than the world ending? Ray Charles and Stevie Wonder in a staring contest.

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A homosexual walks into a church

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Whats green and if it fell out of a tree it would kill you? A golf course

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There once was a man from Nantucket But then he moved to Boston and changes his name to "man from Boston"

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What did the lawyer say to the other lawyer? Hi.

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why was 6 afraid of 7 He raped him the other day

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What did the farmer say when he couldn't find his tractor? Where's my tractor?

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What's worse than a worm in your apple? The Holocost

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How do you stop a second date from happenin? You force a dead mouse in your date's vagina.

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Q: Why does my arm itch? A: I got bit on the arm by a mosquito

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the poll booth to vote on a law restricting the questioning of chickens destination and furthermore to let chickens cross with out ridicule.

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-Wanna hear a joke? -Not really -Oh

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Why doesn't Santa Claus give presents to African children? Because Santa Claus isn't real.

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one day four teenage boys started doing drugs. They jumped off a cliff and died.

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Why did the fish cross the road? Because fish don't have legs and can't walk anywhere

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Yo mamas so fat she weighs more than other people

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Suzie was in a traumatizing accident resulting in her arms getting cut off. Knock Knock? Whos There? Not Suzie.

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why did justin fuck alice and maliyah to have fun

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yo mamas so fat she weighs a lot.

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What time is it? 20:45.

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Why do Mexicans get made fun of? Because they are Mexican

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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