A man rode into town on Friday and came out on Friday how did he manage this? He stayed for a couple of hours

thumb_up thumb_down +5

Situation: 2 cows eating grass on a warm Sunday night. Question: Why does 9+4=3 1/2? Answer: 69!

thumb_up thumb_down +5

Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 brutally murdered 6's entire family.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

A hill billy went fishing

thumb_up thumb_down +5

Did you hear the one about Helen Keller? Neither did she.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

Your moms so fat she struggles to to everyday tasks

thumb_up thumb_down +5

What happens if you're caught strangling a purple leprechaun? You are taken to a mental institution because you have schizophrenia

thumb_up thumb_down +5

Roses are red. Violets are blue. I'm a fish out of water. Help me I'm suffocating.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

Yo mama's so white that she has to use lots of sunscreen to prevent from getting sunburned.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

how do you keep an idiot in suspense. I dont' know he still hasn't told me

thumb_up thumb_down +5

A horse walks into a bar and the bar tender asks "Why the long face?" The horse says nothing because its a horse. It then poops on the floor and leaves

thumb_up thumb_down +5

What did the businessman do to get a promotion? He traded oral sex for his male bosses kind heart...

thumb_up thumb_down +5

How do you starve a black man? You slowly emasculate him over 400 years through a system designed solely for the benefit of whites, and subsequently he is malnourished.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

There was an old lady who swallowed a fly. But everything turned out alright, as the fly was dissolved by stomach acid.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

A Polish immigrant goes to the Department of Motor Vehicles to apply for a driver’s license. He has to take an eye test. They show him a card with the letters C Z W I X N O S T A C Z. “Can you read this?” the optician asks. “Read it?” the Polish guy replies, “No, sir. Allow me to put on my glasses."

thumb_up thumb_down +5

what did the soup kitchen give people for christmas Meatloaf] -Fluzturnusturbusturcusterdustur

thumb_up thumb_down +5

What happened to the pleasure robot he pleasured someone in the pussy

thumb_up thumb_down +5

What's white and can't climb a tree? A Refrigerator

thumb_up thumb_down +5

why did the girl have pink hair? because she died it purple, but it didn't work.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

Your moma so ugly she should go see a plastic surgeon.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

Windows are likes prostitutes. You can have two in the front and two in the back!

thumb_up thumb_down +3

How did Moses make his tea? He steeped the tea leaves for around 5 minutes in hot water.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

What do a baby and popcorn have in common? They both pop in an explosive manner when put in a microwave and both can be consumed by the person who may have put the baby and popcorn in it so if you think this is funny then you have some problems and i will shortly in some period of time when my schedule is cleared refer you to a licensed psychologist and we will make an appointment for you.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

whats the difference between kroush and a bucket of shit? the bucket

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops