Your mom is so fat because she eats too much and is most likely incapable of controlling when to stop.

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Knock, Knock. Who's there? Ron Sparks.

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Why did the boy fall of the swing? He had no arms or legs

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How many people does it take to screw in a lightbulb? One to drop it and die of gas poisoning.

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Person1: Have you heard about the girraffe who doesn't eat Georgia peaches? Person2: yes. Person1: Oh, never mind then.

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Nope, but you know those like little stop motion things with clay figures? Plompsters or something?

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what did the girls scream when they were being stalked? skydragon

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How many Jews can you fit in a car? - Probably about 5 or 6, depending on the car.

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"To tea to to to" -- russian tourist, asking for two tea to room 22. (DOKA)

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If you're happy and you know it get a life

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What's worse than the holocaust? nothing it was a terrible act in history

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What do you call 20 blondes in a freezer? dinner

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A guy is taking a pee in the ocean and a fish swims up and drinks the pee. The fish says "thanks for the lemonade."

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I'm Donald Trump! Wump wump wump! What's good for the goose Is good for the gander I'm Donald Trump!

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Q: Why couldn't the man lick his ice cream? A: Because his body shut down due to the fact that a bullet went straight through his brain. This happened before he could even order his ice cream.

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An American, a Mexican, and a Chinese person are in an airplane. The three of them ponder throwing someone out for a racist reason, but decide to fly to the destination.

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what do you say when you wake up in the middle of the night and see your tv floating thats odd.

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what's the difference between a duck? You can't wash a window with a brick.

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Half empty = half full Therefore Half (empty) = half (full) empty= full Half empty

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How do you kill a Jewish person? You shoot him multiple times in the face

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What is terrible and doesn't exist? This joke's punchline,

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how do you upset a black guy kill his family :)

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Once their was an ugly barnacle. He was sooooo ugly that everyone died! The end. :D

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Feel free to call me, forget the money, as for my fucking eye, I just sure as hell hope those responsible are rotting in prison. I mean I just lost an eye right? Just kidding, I am the one who has been dead wrong here, I judged you wrong, I am the fuck that seems to feel responsible for the actions of others at times, then again I thought that you where sending them against me, they surely claimed they where, but fuck, people use all sorts of things and people as an excuse to do whatever the hell they want.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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