the awkward moment when a fat person says they are fat

why is my wife crying? because she doesn't like tomatoes

what did the guy think who woke up with his hands and feet nailed to a barn. IS THIS BECAUSE IM BLACK!

What did the clock say to the book? I have no batteries.

what do you call a man with a bullet hole in his leg? A man who needs t see a doctor.

bologna

a kid was born with down syndrome on christmas night

If a tree fell in the forest, and no one was around to hear it, would you like a cupcake?

what you say to the kid that just hit puberty? your a young man

Person 1: Why can't a T-Rex clap? Person 2: BECAUSE THEIR ARMS ARE TOO SMALL! Person 1: No, because they are extinct dumbass

Knock knock. Who's there? Boo. Boo who? Boo Radley.

How do you make a little girl laugh. You tell her something funny.

What's worse then me banging your mom? The fact that I gave her HIV

Wooooah! Thats literally the sound I made, anyway, can you like type the entire story in one setting, I feel weird, did you just try to hypnotize me? Anyway, are you trying to, woah, I am like high now...

Why couldn't the man ever reach his dream of becoming a professional athlete? He was pronounced with Alzheimer at a young age and could never remember his dream the next day.

A family walks into a talent agent's office. They do a cute family-friendly performance that they call "The Aristocrats."

Why did the chicken cross the road? Oh..wait...that's actually an anti-joke already...

A my dog was a rappa. He recorded a hit. But it had no lyrics, because he is a dog.

A magician was driving down the road and turned into a driveway...

It is the conjoining of the two possible outcomes of the interstellar and post modern possibilities of the pasta sex god's niece's favorite colour after she falls off her bike whilst riding down a yellow slide after her twenty-seventh birthday when the two suns form a triangle in the night sky over the delta. Yes indeed that was good pudding.

Why did Susie fall off the swings? Because she was hit by a truck.

why did jim die? he had cancer why did jim have no hair? it started to fall out when he was 20 and now he is bald at 30 years old

What is Debbie short for? She has no legs.

Lets Go Lakers!

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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