What do you call a fish with no eyes? Extremely vulnerable to predacious animals such as Brown Bears and Grey Herons

A man calls his 23 year old nephew on a Saturday night. He's calling him, in order to apologise for molesting him when he was younger. As he could no longer live with the guilt and shame. They both start to cry on the phone. The nephew hangs up " I can't do this.." The man receives an email from his boss, saying " Lisa told me she's still waiting for your analysis on the new federal cuts and how they're going to affect us. Please send them asap."

What's red and sweet and good to eat? A riddle that rhymes.

Q. Why did the car break dance? A. I dont know!

how much does a pirate pay for an earing? $2.50

A horse walks into a bar. The bartender asks, "Why the long face?" The horse, incapable of understanding the human languages, promptly shits on the floor and leaves...

Hey can you turn Tmartn upI can't hear him

War horse walks into a bar. The barman says 'why the long film?'

The Joke Below

What happens when a drunk driver meets a stoned driver? A head on collision

Why was six afraid of seven? Because 7 8 9. I'm just counting

Crime in a hen house. All hens killed. Police found the suspected fox quickly and asked him if he have done it. No - he said. But it was him.

How do you make a baby stop crying? Drown it in vinegar.

Why was the boy drinking toilet water? Because he was receiving a violent swirly. He then went home and killed himself.

Why did the dinosaurs become extinct? Because they wanted to.

My Mom was strutting down the runway. Then she got trampled by a plane.

penis

What has 2 wheels and looks like a bike? A bike.

anti jokes are like chickens. they arent funny at all. which makes them funny...

What do you call two babys with one head? I dont know either, answers on postcard please!

What did one fetus say to they other fetus? Nothing they were aborted.

Michael Jackson and Barack Obama talked to each other about oreos

Roses are red Violets are blue Start running Cuz ima F*** you Runn Forest Runn! Jubie

A man sets his house on fire. His wife comes home, what did she ask? Why'd you set the house on fire?

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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