Whats more ugly then seeing a raccoon and a frog f*cking Your mom

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How many rich men does it take to screw in a light bulb? One, to hire an electrician to do it for him.

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A ginger, a brunette and a blonde all go to the store. They are checking out and the ginger says to the blonde, "Why did you get that cereal instead of the one on sale?" And the blonde says "Because I have a membership card that gave me a discount on this cereal." The ginger gets out of line to return her cereal because she remembers she too has a membership card. And then the brunette pulls out a gun and shoots them all because she has depression and needs psychiatric help.

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My mates dad hasnt had a job in 20 years... its probably why there all homless outside my house.

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Chuck Norris was once approached by a woman for whom he had to fight a man to obtain all while doing a mundane activity in an unorthodox manner. He promptly declined for he is married and told the man he only fights for self-defense. He proceeded to put his pants on one leg at a time like everybody else.

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So there's this guy, and he's trying to screw in a lightbulb, right? Well, he did it. Hoorah. His wife was proud.

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Whats the difference between Tina Turner and dead babies? I have never fu*ked Tina Turner before.

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Knock knock Who's there? Me Me who? Just me

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If you're American when you go into the bathroom, and you're American when you come out of the bathroom, what are you when you're in the bathroom? Well, that depends if the apocalypse was happening and if there were even any Americans left at all.

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Is Mike here? Mike Hunt? Has anyone seen Mike Hunt? Yes teacher, he is home sick with the flu.

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roses are red, violets are blue, get on your knees ho, and stick to me like glue.

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a man walks into a bar with a poodle stuffed halfway up his rectum... WHY ARE YOU WAITING FOR A PUNCHLINE!? MY GOD! THIS MAN HAS A DOG UP HIS ANUS!

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How many pupils does the teacher have? 2.

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Why did the girl fall out of the swing? She had no arms.

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Whats the deal with airline food? I dont know, the cost is included in the plane ticket

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I viewed the terms of service and did not agree to them.

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What did Batman say to Robin before getting in the Batmobile? " Hey Robin, get in the Batmobile."

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Alien vs. Predator = Evil Staplers vs. Evil Jamaicans

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How did the hairless cat braid its hair? It didn't, it was hairless. Also, cats do not have opposable thumbs.

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Knock Knock Who's There Carly Carly Who Hey I just met you, and this is crazy So here's my number and call me maybe

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A man walks into a bar, he obtains an alcoholic beverage from the store neighboring this bar which he bumped into.

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knock knock whos there? i dont know arent you supposed to get the door?

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Forgiveness is what weaklings beg for, while redemption is what the strong succeed at.

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What do you call a purple apple? Bruised.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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